this post was submitted on 02 Feb 2024
846 points (95.6% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26718 readers
3632 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 223 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (4 children)

Power move

I'd totally do this on purpose

[–] [email protected] 77 points 9 months ago

As did they.

[–] [email protected] 44 points 9 months ago

Absolute power move.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 146 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (4 children)

I do 3D scanning for one of the more popular high end sites. The guys coat their junk in smooth on & pour silicon in the resulting plaster mold, then send that to me to scan, embedded pubes & all. Not my favorite job but it’s an honest living. Just wish they’d send me some silicon vaginas every once in a while.

Edit: Oh, and Yvette knew exactly wtf she was doing

[–] [email protected] 94 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Edit: Oh, and Yvette knew exactly wtf she was doing

Yeah, who keeps a dildo on their bookshelf on full display, unless they want it to be seen?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Me, though it's more indifference than active desire

Brought my wife's bad dragon collection out so she could show a friend the different firm esses and my ADHD ass put one on the shelf

It's been there for months, keeps getting put back there

I could go move it right now if I wanted but now that's it's place now

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 142 points 9 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 287 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Nothing’s wrong with dildos, but it has to be pretty embarrassing to show the world that you read books

[–] [email protected] 89 points 9 months ago (3 children)

That's why I only fill my bookshelf with bad dragon toys

[–] [email protected] 55 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Just imagine the wobble that goes through this array of assorted dragon dicks when someone bumps that shelf.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

I want nothing more than to sporadically think of this throughout the day today

Edit: Imagine my equal delight and disappointment to realize we weren’t talking about actual tiny dragon toys

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 37 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I wouldn't exactly put dildos and professionalism in the same category

[–] [email protected] 53 points 9 months ago (7 children)

Depends on the profession, I suppose.

Do dildo testers have a union?

[–] [email protected] 25 points 9 months ago (8 children)

what about dildo producers?
Dildo designers?
Dildo community managers?

load more comments (8 replies)
load more comments (6 replies)
[–] [email protected] 28 points 9 months ago (1 children)

There's professional porn actor and prostitute probably.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 141 points 9 months ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 120 points 9 months ago (6 children)

What? She likes sex? Such a freak! What a scandal! /i

[–] [email protected] 103 points 9 months ago (9 children)

Having sex toys in a professional setting is... Unprofessional.

[–] [email protected] 48 points 9 months ago

Unless the profession is porn lol

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago

I mean it looks like an office in their home, which is where such an error is completely understandable and forgiveable

Also, in the right context and to the right person a slightly-comically proportioned phalace can be a very funny and heartfelt gift especially when paired with a good punchline. I have a relative who works for the government, and received a penis-shaped bottle opener as a gift from a colleague in another agency after working a long-term project together with the attached commentary that his team wasn't the easiest to work with. Knowing the recipient plus how he loves to pull it out and tell the story every chance he gets, it's probably the best gift that he could've gotten.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago

Depends on the profession...

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Yeah, I'm sure the calls of 'neckbeard' and 'incel' would be non-existent if it were a male subject with his fleshlight on full display.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Her liking sex/masturbation isn't bad. It's just kinda awkward to accidentally let millions of people see your sex toys.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (3 children)

It's only taboo because of conservative evangelism, really. Like the difference in how the US vs Europe perceives sex vs. violence.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 67 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Either 100% deliberate or a prank by a mate. Either way. Win.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Last time this made the rounds, it was said she didn't know the dildo was there, a friend put it there as a prank. It was also said she deleted all her social media and whatnot afterwards too. I don't have source and admit I can be totally off

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 65 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Girthy little guy, isn't he?

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (2 children)

At least it wasn't stereotypically black

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 58 points 9 months ago

Good for her.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 9 months ago (3 children)

.... I'm not even upset. That's impressive. Quite a specimen she has there. Very nice.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 9 months ago

Let’s see Paul Allen’s dildo.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 46 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Genuine question because I have no idea who that is, did she do this on purpose so that people would be fished into watching the video and therefore listening to what she is saying there?

[–] [email protected] 45 points 9 months ago (4 children)

Definitely. What kind of animal stores a dildo on their bookshelf. You’re supposed to keep it safely tucked inside yourself.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago

She went on the BBC (no pun intended) to talk about her problems finding employment.

So it's possible but my spidey sense is she's doing it for a laugh.

However normal reminder, don't put anything in backgrounds that you don't want screen capped and sent first to your colleagues and subsequently to the world. Aka passwords, pin numbers, phone numbers, notes, org charts, technical artefacts or business sensitive information (including whiteboards)

[–] [email protected] 44 points 9 months ago

Fuckin coke can of a dong

[–] [email protected] 40 points 9 months ago

A dildo, OUTRAGEOUS! Bring the fainting bed!

[–] [email protected] 29 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Thousands of sensitive alpha males suddenly feel inadequate.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 28 points 9 months ago

A BWC on BBC.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I've heard people say "the BBC".

I've heard people say "BBC News".

Ive never heard anyone say "the BBC News".

...

and that cock isn't even black.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago

What's the point of having a Horga'hn if you don't display it.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago

In the search for a mate, it's important to set certain expectations early on.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago

Nothing wrong with it but still embarrassing

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago

I swear I've seen this before, like pre-YouTube or circa 2001. i even remember the woman only lasting a few minutes on the forum that was scrutinizing it because she didn't seem to be aware of trolls. if this is a recent interview then maybe it was done as some sort of homage. only way i would have come across it back then was if someone threw up a link in general chat on pirat4x4.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (4 children)

The only negative thing I see there is Brian's rather backwards moralist judgement.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 41 points 9 months ago (3 children)

What a shit site and shit article.

There are multiple videos playing at the same time, all having the "wowowow, can you believe it? Here, loads of yellow arrows and circles for that dildo because WOWOWOWOOW!

yeah, the thing that happened is slightly funny, but can we not be 12, please?

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›