this post was submitted on 01 Nov 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] [email protected] 138 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 45 points 3 days ago

*Too many cooks *

[–] [email protected] 72 points 3 days ago (1 children)

In my elementary school play of Cinderella. I was cast as a pile of animated clothes. My role was to lay still and then suddenly spin around like one of those spinning brushes in a carwash and flail off the stage.

[–] [email protected] 57 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 68 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Yeah I tripped, knocked a stage light over, and burned everything to the ground. I was the only survivor.

Was called the "Tragic Cinderella Sizzler" by local newspapers.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Are you sure that you're remembering this right?

I find it hard to believe that the newspaper didn't come up with a headline based on calling her "Cinders".

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

"This play really sparked a fire in us, the whole building really"

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 days ago

To shreds you say?

[–] [email protected] 61 points 3 days ago (5 children)

It's a school activity, why isn't the school paying for the materials

[–] [email protected] 59 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 41 points 3 days ago (1 children)

In America they make you pay for your child's own religious indoctrination

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I would prefer it that way. Government funded religious indoctrination makes me nervous.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago

Yeah, about that...

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Cause funding the military is 50% of our taxes 🤸🤼‍♀️🤹‍♂️

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The military budget is 36x bigger than NASA.

Mars could be the 51st state if the US were not so war hungry.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (5 children)

Mars colonizing is not really a useful idea, it's technically somewhat possible but there isn't a lot to gain from it.

Instead, keeping the earth habitable would be much more useful.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago

The technology needed to inhabit Mars would 100% benefit the life on earth. Just lookup all the tech we got from the Apollo missions.

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago

Because this is America. I had to buy a history textbook in high school. Good thing we have enough money for a genocide though /s

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

And why is a school doing a nativity.

I'm Christian and have taken part in dozens of nativity, but none at school.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Many (but not all) private schools in the US are religious. From elementary school through college I attended Catholic affiliated schools. This sort of display would not be allowed at most public schools, and the ones that would allow it would be sued.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago (2 children)

It's most likely a private school.

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[–] [email protected] 50 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Door? At the nativity? Did they finally got a room on the b&b?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Maybe she's the door the innkeeper slams in their faces.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

There's actually a Jesus Christ Superstar parody told from the view of the innkeeper (featuring The Mighty Boosh's Noel Fielding and Julian Barratt, Julia Davis, Rich Fulcher, Matt Lucas, Matt Berry and Richard Ayoade):

AD/BC: A Rock Opera

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

This actually brought back bad memories for me. Depressing stuff follows:

I went to a private school and had the same teacher for all six years. He hated me for multiple reasons and a lot of things he did to me would be considered just plain abusive today. It was bad to the point that my parents, who didn't understand the issue, only figured it out when my mom ran into a schoolmate of mine years later in a supermarket and she told my mother that she felt so bad for me because of how he treated me.

Anyway, one of the first signs of this was that in first grade, we were going to do a winter puppet show for the parents. Like I said, this was a private school. It was split into grades 1-3 and grades 4-6, so we're talking like 10 kids here. I was super excited because I have always loved performing. He knew I was super excited. So he cast me as... snowflakes. I had to hold up too snowflakes on sticks and move them around. I was absolutely crushed.

The good part is that as an adult, I've been paid to do standup and have done some critically well-received VO work (for some names you would recognize but I'm not going to say, sorry).

So fuck him.

Anyway, not your fault, I just had to let that out.

Back to the fun.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

I'll wait to see if the kid can swing it

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I thought casting students as inanimate objects or plants only happened in TV shows.

[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 days ago

No no. I was a tree as a child too. I don't remember what the play was.

Not to brag, but I was the only tree with a line.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 3 days ago (4 children)

It's a mathematical reality if you want to give every kid in a class a role.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Take some liberties: for one, it's a manger, add animals. For two, it's a work of fiction, add aliens, or Wookies, or robots. For three, the whole point is to have kids feel included and be interested, so add MDMA or something.

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 days ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 45 points 3 days ago

It's a major plot point for the Jesus fandom.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago

it's like the birth of Jesus Christ type sh, https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nativity_of_Jesus

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

... With cardboard and string.

Thanks. Appreciate the assist

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 days ago (1 children)

They couldn't add an extra animal in the manger?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 days ago

All this overfishing man

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 days ago

I was a dead alien in our primary schools' production of Men In Black.

My role was to go limp in a chair and let one of my classmates mockingly wave my corpse limbs around in lieu of dancing.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 days ago (1 children)

rough way to tell parents that their child is as dumb as a doorknob

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I thought it was a-door-able

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 days ago (1 children)

So she should dress up like Jim Morrison? Odd for a nativity scene but whatever.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This better be a private school

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[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

google door costume

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

One does not merely turn their child into a door.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

will at least she'll finally have the right wing weirdos advocating for her empowerment.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago

In high school, I was in a production of A Midsummer Night's Dream (I was act 2 open fairy/Peasblossom) and the absolute best part was the play in a play, Wall spoke her lines and flapped off stage like an enormous bat, funniest part of the whole play.

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