this post was submitted on 25 Oct 2024
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[–] [email protected] 110 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hey, FBI... Can I get a warning on my next felony?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Get away with the first two, and you earn a warning, is that how law enforcement works now at the DOJ?

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I'm fantasizing about what I'd use my mulligan on. No violence, maybe like a big drug score?

[–] [email protected] 101 points 1 month ago (3 children)

AND YA BETTER NOT DO IT AGAIN OR ILL GET REEEAAAL GRUMPY!

The American Justice system is so embarrassingly lenient to the rich. How are you guys not rioting every single day?

[–] [email protected] 59 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Because there is no social safety net. Rioting could lead to arrest and job loss. Resulting in loss of home, medical insurance, etc.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago

That’s… sad and disturbing.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Because the DOJ would throw me in jail

[–] [email protected] 66 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Billionaires get warnings lol.

Poor people get prison rape.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

And their hired thugs that get caught get Epsteined.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Buy drugs to enjoy in your free time: jail
Buy votes to sway the country and its laws: warning

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

He probably spends thousands a month on Ketamine... so I don't know if that's necessarily true.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Ketamine is my drug of choice, so I believe I can say with almost certainty Elon does not. Because if he did, he'd see how stupid he is and how wrong his decisions are. And what kind of destruction he creates to the world and society.

Since he's narcissistic AF, believes he owns the world, the law doesn't apply to him and is better then everyone else I believe his drug of choice is cocain.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

His drug of choice is ketamine, it's well known, he isn't shy about it. His friends have said something like "he microdoses daily and macrodoses often at parties"

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Then his dealer is fucking with him 😂

[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 month ago

Musk didn’t buy votes. If he bought anything, then he bought petition signatures.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (2 children)

If I were to break federal law I would get indicted not a warning

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

Sounds like you're either not rich enough, not white enough, or both.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Rules for thee not for me.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The DOJ is not "The American People".

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

The DOJ = The Billionaire Oligarchy

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 month ago

Can I get a warning for murdering?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago

They should double-warn him. These limp-wristed single warnings aren't doing the trick. Maybe even triple-dog-warn him for good measure—no tag-backs.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

It's the us. If you're rich you get warned

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

yeah i know. needs to change

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

"Stop or I will yell 'stop' again!"

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

We should try asking politely if he'd care to consider the law, if it pleases him to do so, in the future.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

We didn't like the term kangaroo court so we just stopped going to court.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If Musk was Chinese he'd be in gitmo by now.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

No. That's if he's Arab. Chinese get interned.

Or if China doesn't like them either, "returned to the homeland" where they'll be disappeared forever in one of their, "put them here until trial" black holes where people go in but they don't come out (without the right bribes/political influence).

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Unbelievable

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago