this post was submitted on 20 Sep 2024
783 points (97.0% liked)

Greentext

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This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

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[–] [email protected] 231 points 1 month ago (5 children)

Who else was waiting for the plot twist? I thought she dumps him because his voice sounds like a drowning pig in panic or so... :'D

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago (1 children)

After my girlfriend gained the ability to smell, she dumped me. She hates roses now though

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

How do you suddenly gain that ability? Are there implants for smell as well? Or did they extract some lego bricks that she stuffed up her nose as a kid?

[–] [email protected] 20 points 1 month ago (1 children)

might've recovered from long COVID

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

it's a rare wholesome greentext

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[–] [email protected] 166 points 1 month ago (9 children)

If someone is deaf from birth and gains hearing from implants later in life, you whisper in their ear and they can't see your lips they won't understand because they have never heard the audio before. Is this correct?

[–] [email protected] 97 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Yeah. Unless she is only partially deaf or had hearing before and lost it, she won’t understand him.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (3 children)

or he may have signed while saying it.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago

I think it would be instinct by that point.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (3 children)

In the beggining he said after a while she noticed or something like that so it means she had partial hearing loss.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Yes, but it’s not just deaf from birth people. Your brain has to wire itself to understanding the signals from the implant

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[–] [email protected] 140 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I like to think based on how this story is worded she always had implants but never knew to turn them up

[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago (1 children)

what if we all have implants but never knew how to turn them down?

[–] [email protected] 48 points 1 month ago (1 children)

a screwdriver does the trick, its a one time adjustment though

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[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago

losing the user manual is a bitch

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[–] [email protected] 112 points 1 month ago (6 children)

So it’s fake because 4chan. But also it’s fake because even if you’re late deafened you need to learn how to hear after getting cochlear implants.

Also because it’s rare for adults fluent in sign language with a supportive network to choose CIs unless late deafened

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

what if they're both fat

[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago

the real question is if it's also gay too.

dont ask me i don't use four chan.

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 1 month ago (4 children)

This is fake, but not gay.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Turns out anon is a female

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Did Anon specify their gender?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

CAN I BE OFFENDED ON ANON'S BEHALF PLEASE

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[–] [email protected] 63 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Maybe it was a bit much to ask that during such an emotional moment? I mean, let the woman decide when she has her wits together..

[–] [email protected] 82 points 1 month ago (2 children)

don't worry, greentexts are fiction

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago (1 children)

NO, IM FINE. ITS ALLERGIES.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

WHO'S CUTTING ONIONS IN THE HOSPITAL?

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I never expect when greentexts hit right in the feels.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago

Never knowing what to expect is the fun part of reading greentexts.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

This is really cute, but the first thing you should've said to her is the cheesy pick up line from the day you met her.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"So, as I was trying to say..."

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Guy love deaf girl. Girl hearing fixed. Guy say he love her.

[–] [email protected] 58 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

I love wholesome greentexts

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago

"just a little better" probably an understatement

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