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“Dear America: You are waking up, as Germany once did, to the awareness that 1/3 of your people would kill another 1/3 while 1/3 watches.”—Incorrectly attributed to Werner Herzog but just some random person on the internet it seems.
Still the quote makes sense even without the appeal to authority
Thanks, TheReturnOfPEB for correcting me
Only this time instead of a silly mustache model, we have a cheeto baked rolley-polley.
What a wonderfully horrifying quote
Waking up? I'm pretty sure we've been well aware sense the civil war. Most of us are just Squidward.
Nah. America had Nazis in the 30s too. We're immune to the most rabid varieties of fascism and authoritarianism because they don't produce all the cool products Americans demand.
Americans might be plagued with racism and bigotry, but we're way too lazy and invested in our own lives for a coup. Literally our bread and circuses are way too good.
Your bread is pretty shit though. One of the things I miss when I'm over for more than a week is actual, good bread.
Good bread is expensive or made yourself.
It seems pretty common for travelers to lament the lack of good bread like at home. Bread basically a living organism that is ultra local. Good bread like at home really only exists at home. Local water, temperature, humidity, and other environmental factors seem to play a big part.
Ask anyone from New York or New Jersey about getting a good pizza or bagel in another state. It doesn't matter who makes it or if they're using the exact same recipe, perfect bread can evidently not be replicated outside the region. There is even a bagel company in south Florida, catering to snowbirds turned transplants, that claims to use water from that region to make their bagels.
It's not as delicate a matter as you make it out to be. I was just looking for a kind that isn't mushy like toast or full of sugar like a bagle. If classic sourdough or whole grain with an actual crust exist in the US it's not trivial to find for foreign visitors.
Yeah, good food isn't trivial to find when you travel. I'm empathetic to that frustration. But judging all bread based on the cheapest abundant and easy to find bread a foreigner can find without any apparent effort seems like a mistake to me. I certainly wouldn't judge all Italian food by what I found in my hotel in Venice. I wouldn't judge NY bagels by what I found during my layover at La Guardia. And I wouldn't judge an entire countries bread based on what I found in the grocery store.
Whole Foods has a great bakery. It was a loaf I bought there that inspired me to start making sourdough. Locally, we have "Cuban bread" that I'm pretty sure is really Tampa bread, if you get it at the right bakeries it's great. Supermarket bread is mostly nonsense, is that not true elsewhere?
Good bread like at home really only exists at home.
Or at a quality bakery. But those aren't nearly as profitable as fast food joints.
Old-style Korean bakery goods... yummy...
That describes the 2/3rds that's watching or being killed. Our complacency is what makes us vulnerable.
We’re immune to the most rabid varieties of fascism
Doubt.jpeg
I think most of us are less apathetic like Squidward and more just exhausted. We care about a lot of the things happening, but there's so much going on we physically can't keep track of, let alone care about, it all, so we don't. We just don't have the mental or emotional energy for it.
We're all trying to be SpongeBob, but we're all subject to being a Squidward some days.
It's not just Americans. As a Canadian we're deeply affected by American situations (plus our own politics). Sometimes the only way to put up with the complex world we live in is a little Squidwardism
I feel for you. On behalf of my country, I would like to apologize for all the bullshit we put you all through. You deserve better neighbors. :(
........covfefe.
Oh hey I think I'm in this picture.
Are you the styrofoam cup
And then the red second someone from Europe cracks wise about it, all of them descend upon the poor healthcare haver like a pack of rabid wolves.
For how capable we are of recognizing and hating our own problems, we are equally incapable of hearing about them from anyone else without punching said anyone else in the face for talking shit.
Salutes flag, sheds patriotic tear, admires eagle screeching while spreading its wings before the majestic sunset
I still feel like half of the time the people from Europe are using it as an opportunity to pat themselves on the back for something they were born into. (I can make this criticism because I'm from there)
And ignoring the fact that they just elected a political party that wants to eliminate the very thing they're bragging about, because an immigrant might be able to afford a doctor.
Trust me, i'm not patting myself anywhere. I live in Italy.
Well the one thing that would make this picture an absolutely perfect representation of America is if there was a TV in the background saying "American People, the American People want to take your money and give it to American People! American People are trying to destroy America! Only we can save America!"
Fucking propagandists are the cause of this whole picture and I fucking hate them with a passion.
Europeans and Americans are natural enemies. Just like Americans and Russians. And Americans and Americans. Damn Americans! You ruined America!
Under the “right” circumstances, any of us could be any of those characters.
I’m Squidward. At some point we have to realize that it’s not our fellow Americans fault they are misinformed and undereducated, it’s the fault of the ruling class and how we are being educated. The ruling class is never going to teach you the means to overthrow them. Unfortunately, it is up to us as individuals to teach each other critical thinking, media literacy and our shared history. It was never us versus MAGA, us versus the boomers, us versus the tankies. It was always us versus the rich. 🤑
Gotta hand it to the politicians and the media. After that Occupy Wallstreet business, they got to work real quick turning Americans against each other. Successful.
Oh right, it's not like we fought a civil war over a hundred years before that, and to this day there are still people here flying the losing sides flag. We've been turning on each other a long time. It's an American tradition at this point.
Being miserable and treating other people like dirt is every N̶e̶w̶ ̶Y̶o̶r̶k̶e̶r̶ American’s God-given right.
Ah yes, united.
Untied
Just balkanize already
It's rural vs urban, just like in a lot of other countries. Pretty tough to separate that way since they both depend on each other.
More urban versus suburban. The suburbs are an enormous money sink that require tons of subsidy and infrastructure expansion to persist. A bunch of our municipal, state, and national policy revolves around keeping life in the suburbs artificially cheap and expanding the housing stock.
Rural communities don't have anywhere near the kind of political influence as the suburbs, as they lack a wealthy professional workforce or a large enfranchised voter base to command elected offices. While you definitely see rural politics show up in suburban races, they tend to revolve around cultural icons (driving a big truck versus riding the bus, having a big yard versus living in a town home, proximity to colleges and communities of color, taste in clothing or music) rather than actual rural political issues (water rights, agricultural labor issues, affordable education and health care).
Rural communities get steamrolled as regularly as urban communities. We're seeing that now in Texas, where the governor is turning a blind eye to another big drought and unleashing his police force on migrant farm workers as he gets ready to axe all the public schools out in the tiny towns and force people into low-budget charters. Urban centers are louder in their opposition, but the rural neighborhoods are getting fucked just as hard.
Yes I agree, and that's a reality that we don't point out often enough. Even so, schisms really tend to happen more along cultural boundaries than actual policy.
Saying "American people" the way the Beastie Boys would say "Another dimension"