this post was submitted on 01 May 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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And I don't care if you don't get it. I get it.

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[–] [email protected] 71 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

A longer stick would be preferable

[–] [email protected] 62 points 6 months ago

It wouldn't be a doomsday weapon if it didn't also kill the wielder.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

A few miles longer, just to be safe.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Demon Core flail

18 blunt damage 65 radiant damage over time No saving throw

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

18 blunt, 65 radiant damage, 6 constitution damage, continuous 1 constitution damage per day.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Eh 65 is survivable. We're looking at more like 650.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (2 children)

The folks exposed died a few days after. So it wasn't instant. Very slow and horrible probably as all their organs and cells died at a molecular level and skin fell off.

So damage over time and can not be healed. Would be accurate.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Slotin knew he fucked up as soon as it happened too. Apparently, he would always use a screwdriver to hold the thing open and was warned multiple times he was gonna kill himself. He did use himself as a human shield, though (not sure if it was deliberate or just happenstance), and ended up being the only fatality in that incident, iirc.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

In fairness, several others in the room died years-to-decades later of leukemias that were arguably attributable to their exposures. That said, the Slotin criticality accident is one of those cases where nuclear disasters end up being both completely horrifying and a lot less deadly than you think they ought to be.

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[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

1d65 radiant damage per day in perpetuity

[–] [email protected] 33 points 6 months ago (2 children)

i mean, to be clear, this isn't a doomsday weapon, this is what we call a mass casualty weapon.

This is probably more closely related to starting a fire in the middle of a battlefield more than anything.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 months ago

i'm fun! You just need to be technically accurate when you're having fun smh.

Now to be fair, i do have an autistic interest in nuclear power, so i know more than the average person. But like, it only makes it funnier :)

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

What's not fun about starting a fire in the middle of a battlefield?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

that is pretty fun, you're not wrong, probably also pretty funny too.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

i do have an autistic interest in nuclear power, so i know more than the average person. But like, it only makes it funnier

"You know what's funny?" Asked KillingTimeItself while flicking another match into the brush. "If we had the demon core here and I threw it and hit someone with it in such a way that it momentarily reached prompt criticality, it would be like stabbing them with the world's slowest knife. Heck, even if you missed, it would still be like a cancer knife that would get them years later."

FlyingSquid looked on incredulously. "Man, that's fucked up."

Just then, the brush caught fire, setting the active battlefield alight and casting a glow on TheFartographer's face, who was jealous because he forgot to bring matches or a lighter. All three friends giggled and snuck away from the fire.

Just then, TheFartographer got shot in the ass two inches from his butthole and died immediately. FlyingSquid and KillingTimeItself took TheFartographer's shoes and looted his body, using the valuables to buy more matches in town. They really hadn't gotten that close to TheFartographer in their time together and he could be a bit of a bastard.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Make it the size of the moon. Now it's a doomsday weapon?

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 6 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 55 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Demon Core. It was meant to be part of a third nuclear bomb to be dropped on Japan, but after their surrender, the core was used in two experiments which both killed several people via exposure to lethal doses of radiation.

[–] [email protected] 31 points 6 months ago

It was used in hundreds of experiments, two of which killed the respective operator and injured others.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

2nd guy was asking for it. Poor, dumb, bastard.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

My favourite thing about that story remains that even if everything had gone to plan and he hadn't fully dropped the second half , it would still just be a couple of dudes with PhDs only slightly irradiating their own junk.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

My favourite part from reading it then is:

Enrico Fermi reportedly told Slotin and others they would be "dead within a year" if they continued performing the test in that manner.

Slotin died.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

A third testicle is sexy, okay? Though maybe not on the head...

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago (2 children)

The first time this thing killed someone was because they dropped a brick on it. The second time this thing killed someone was because they were fuckin around with it using a screwdriver

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (2 children)

"Bro watch this"

[everyone in the room dies horribly over the course of several days]

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

"just a prank bro"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Didn't they all have to stay in the same hospital room/area too? You'd be getting grilled for that till you die

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yeah reading the Wikipedia article, the drop is unfortunate but the screwdriver bit, what a fucking moron. And he regularly did this while others observed, like fuck me if you're going to be a dumbass, be a dumbass by yourself, dumbass.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago

Oh, for sure, the screwdriver was a "hold my beer" moment. The brick, though, I gotta disagree. While it was an unfortunate accident, we knew enough about radiation at that point to know even tiny accidents could delete you. Playing Legos around something I know could kill me in an attempt to ease it to the point of maybe almost killing me just sounds like a slightly better thought out way of asking someone to hold my beer

[–] [email protected] 22 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Bartender, I'll have a screwdriver.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

My hands feel weird...

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago

Good thing I’m always carrying a screwdriver

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago (1 children)

So like when, what I assume is an irradiated piece of metal, slipped in the back of Homer's shirt he killed himself and like the entire town, right?

The thing was glowing.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago

That's when all the people of Springfield turned yellow.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Would anyone not get it, lol

Demon core memes have been absolutely fucking everywhere

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Me, I have no idea what this is about.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Look up demon core on Wikipedia. It was the core from a nuclear weapon. Some dumbasses decided to play with it in very dangerous and stupid ways and died.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Took 12 upvotes for the answer. Thank you.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Some dumbasses

ironically some of the top scientists in the world at the time

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Yes, at least one person according to the comments.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

All it took is a good swing, and then your enemy are gone... as well as anything else in a couple of kilometers.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago (2 children)

except for the fact that it would be more like 50m at most, assuming that you count still living for 20 years, and the fact that the person wielding the weapon has already melted into a puddle of goo by that point, yeah. It's a weapon with a ranged attack.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

I get it. Thanks to Kyle Hill

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Ooh ya clap those cheeks

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Clap them cheeks

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)

“The Ultimate Cheek Clapper”

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