this post was submitted on 31 Jan 2024
606 points (97.2% liked)

Funny: Home of the Haha

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[–] [email protected] 157 points 9 months ago (4 children)

I love how she uses "little bird" as example for how great her nicknames are

[–] [email protected] 53 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I call my wife that occasionally, but only when I ask what the word is ("what's the word, little bird?")

[–] [email protected] 36 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Does she respond "how now brown cow?"

[–] [email protected] 57 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

I'm thinking more like: "I want a divorce, charley horse."

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago (1 children)

"Blow it out your ass, you rotting bass."

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Imma gonna eat ya, Tony pizza.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Oooh she'll like that one!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

I'm gonna eat you out, my little trout.

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[–] [email protected] 25 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Bird. Bird’s the word. Ah B-B-Bird bird bird. Bird is the word.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago (3 children)

That was the nickname they used for Tevye’s daughter Chavala in Fiddler on the Roof.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Tony Pizza? I haven't watched that movie in a while, but I feel like I'd remember Tony Pizza being serenaded by the tailor to "Wonder of Wonders."

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago

If I ever refer to anyone as little bird it'll include miniguns.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MD_Helicopters_MH-6_Little_Bird

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[–] [email protected] 151 points 9 months ago

"Please help, the wedding is in three hours."

[–] [email protected] 87 points 9 months ago (5 children)

Do people really put that much thought into pet names? I've always thought it should be something that comes about organically, not something forced.

[–] [email protected] 45 points 9 months ago (3 children)

it should be something that comes about organically, not something forced.

Ok, but my pet name for you is now Hemorrhoids Henry

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (1 children)

See, organic would have been calling MinorLaceration The Black Knight. "'Tis but a scratch."

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Well my significant other is not creative at all, and started calling me poop-y, which i dislike (there are so many words, why pick a term for excrement), In that case, I had to speak my mind and explain that I did not like that pet name. Sometimes, nature needs a little help

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (4 children)

My pet name for my wife is sarcastic. Same back.

We tried the normal ones; no good.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 9 months ago

You really call her "sarcastic" to her face?

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago

One day my wife said "see you later, alligator" and I reflexively replied "bye gator" and she's been gator ever since.

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[–] [email protected] 65 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I would love if my spouse had a weird-ass nickname for me like that.

[–] [email protected] 60 points 9 months ago (3 children)

My wife has thousands of cute nicknames for our dogs. She calls me by my first name.

[–] [email protected] 49 points 9 months ago (3 children)

I bet you're in her phone with your last name, too.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 9 months ago

This comment could start a war, jeez

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago

I'm "Asshole" in my wife's phone. I discovered this years after she had it that when she used Google assistant to call my phone when I was looking for it. "OK Google, call my husband " "OK, calling Asshole"

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 9 months ago

Aww, Pencil Dumpling... You're not missing out on much!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago (2 children)

I love you, sour meat 💖

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 9 months ago

Classic.

This is one of my favorite internet stories.

[–] [email protected] 47 points 9 months ago

Call me Anthony Pizza!

[–] [email protected] 33 points 9 months ago (2 children)

damn, the shittiest frozen pizza...

[–] [email protected] 29 points 9 months ago (8 children)

Sometimes it's exactly what you want, though.

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago

What a delightful microcosm of the human experience. Tony Pizza.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 9 months ago
[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago

Some women just don't know how to appreciate a keeper :/

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'll just leave this graffiti here.

fartdog ❤️s munki

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

The Crevice

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