Ask Lemmy

Common cheap field drug tests commonly react to (yield substance-positive results) to other substances such as powdered sugar, human ashes, some foodstuffs and plastics.

Normally an additional sample is supposed to be sent to a lab for more specific results, but the courts in most states accept the field tests as definitive. A positive result is definitely probable cause, which allows officers to search your vehicle or home and take your money and solvent assets, as per asset forfeiture.

But yes, you can expect common substances to be grounds for a drug trafficking charge. Is an execution summary (id est, on sight)?

Distracted driving is as dangerous as drunk driving.

The #1 cause of distracted driving is cellphones.

Cellphones are now illegal.

Education increases the likelihood of earning a higher income.

Money is used to buy drugs.

All education is now illegal.

Sugar increases the risk of health complications, therefore selling products containing added sugar is assault

Obviously, anyone selling guns would be slippery slope murder.

But, military contractors would be committing slippery slope war crimes, including genocide.

Gas stations for selling those crack pipes which facilitate drug use.

Car dealerships would be aiding & abetting. They'd also be involved with vehicular manslaughter, drug trafficking, sex trafficking, ...really any trafficking. Add all transportation forms to the list.

Bars for DUIs and related deaths. Also, child abuse, physical & sexual assault.

All comms technology, including phones & computers, would be involved in espionage & conspiracy. Internet device manufacturers and ISPs would be engaged in facilitating data piracy & fraud.

Giving birth is a capital crime, because you're bringing someone who will one day die into the world

Oh you’re good at running? Running from what, hmmm…?

You walk or you die.

Charging your phone is murder because coal-fired power plants kill 43,000 people per year (in the US alone).

Outlaw schools. They provide an education like chemistry or physics which can help people try to get away with murder.

Rubbing one out lowers aggression, ergo masturbation is now mandatory. You all know what to do here, people.

Losing your job increases your likelihood to steal by like a bajillion percent.

Empty your desk and report to the prison by noon.

I sure wouldn't want to be in the rope business.

Baking bread is the same as moonshining