this post was submitted on 17 Sep 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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top 29 comments
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[–] [email protected] 49 points 1 month ago (4 children)

I hesitate to ask about the folding of genitals...

[–] [email protected] 37 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You have to origami your schlong into a flower or a bird of your choice

[–] [email protected] 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Congratulations, here is your complimentary tree bark snack.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

That's a stated end point not instructions.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 month ago

It would certainly explain the loud screaming

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

That's what folding@home was all about

[–] [email protected] 15 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Well, you get your genitals and then you fold them.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't think I'm explaining this right, you grab your genitals and fold it over itself.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hotdog or hamburger style?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's a personal choice, but, historically the preferred style is the hamburger.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

The plot foldens..

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I can't tell you everything, Michael

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

But can you tell me anything?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Same as unfolding them, but in reverse.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

It's a tad harder to fold them, but yeah pretty much the same, I just use one finger to unfold mine, but I've had a lot of practise.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 31 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

"33 lunar seconds"

You really had to bring relativity to a fucking joga class. How am I supposed to center myself with existential horrors of the block universe and my illusionary free will.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

block universe

Next up: Minecraft yoga

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

What do you do with your genitals in that one? Block? Punch?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

Hard pass. I only do hot, wet and naked yoga while being observed by bald eagles.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

The genital folding will continue until ~~morale~~ flexibility improves.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

I ain't going a day without onions for anything in the world.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

Shit. I can only do solar seconds... Dammit! I stopped eating onions for no reason!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is hilarious. Any chance it is real?

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Apparently:

Wet yoga is a new and innovative form of yoga that involves practicing traditional yoga poses while being submerged in water. It combines the physical and mental benefits of both yoga and swimming, providing a unique experience for practitioners.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

So it’s not just misting “herbal fluids” on people doing yoga poses who are folding or unfolding their genitals?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

This specific ad is like a 15 year old meme at this point and is likely incredibly fake though.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

The wetter the better. Can still eat all the garlic you want.