this post was submitted on 07 Aug 2024
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NonCredibleDefense

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[–] [email protected] 69 points 3 months ago (20 children)

🔫

I LIED, THERE IS NO COMMENT SECTION

NOW SIT DOWN AND GIVE ME YOUR BEST NONCREDIBLE BABY NAMES

[–] [email protected] 40 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)

I'm somewhat partial to Mirv

Edit: they grow up so fast

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That was my laptop background for a really long time, almost feels nostalgic to see it again!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

It's a great photo. Fucking terrifying to think that there could have been a 300kt boom at the end of each of those pretty lines

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh absolutely, that right there is annihilation in a picture. You wouldn't even see the lines, just a wall of nuclear blasts. It feels surreal that this is something that not only exists but that humans, human individuals, have access to in the thousands.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Gods are we. Capricious, horny Greek mythology gods, but still.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Rich,is that you? Hope you are okay after MRV crash.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Can a bitch have some context, please

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

So glad you asked. Rich, aka New York National Guard, aka Buffalo police officer, aka "AngryCops", bought a fire truck and had it converted to a Morale Response Vehicle, for veterans and charity events. It's a bit like the vet version of ECTO-1 from Ghostbusters, but even louder and with cold kegs. I heard a rumor about a crash, hope it's not a RIP for the MRV. POB.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

That's one of the most American things I have heard in a while

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Yeah. I'm glad I could be the one to force you down this path. A path to an Angry Drill Sergeant.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Why are drill sergeants so angry anyhow?

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[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 19 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Robert'); DROP TABLE Students;--

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago

Little Bobby Tables, we call him

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Haimars

Leopard

Bradley

Griepen

Vaiper

Falcon

Neto

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

F-16 viper, first of its name, fighter of falcons, yeeter of aim 9x, user of afterburner, bringer of the pimp hand… future extra goes here

I prefer long names you just keep tacking crap onto like samurai or old knight kinda names.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Flugabwehrkanonenpanzer Gepard

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Fighting Falcon.

Friends will call them F-16.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The name’s Joint. Rivet Joint. Intelligence is my game.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Bunkerbuster

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

butt stockton

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 3 months ago

So now I understand why Musk hates Ukraine.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 months ago (1 children)

We are glad to welcome to the family our new bundle of joy, Fsixteen Fuckputin.

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[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 months ago (4 children)

Some alternatives:

  • Fighting Falcon
  • Strike Eagle
  • Raptor
  • Stealth

Then the kid just goes by a nickname.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

Raptor is going to KILL the social circle in elementary school.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago
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[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago

So BRRRRT is still fine?

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

What if they named the kid "Eff Sixteen" or "Raptor?"

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

You mean "Viper"?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

But Lil TomyF-16 has such a good ring to it

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

He has so much fun playing in the backyard with lil B2 Stealth Bonnie & her brother, Chase the Choppa.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Interesting. Assuming real, in a war-torn country, I could imagine this is to combat accidental exclamations of a name that could lead people to act rashly.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago (2 children)

With Russia kidnapping children, it's they much harder to get them back without conventional names.. We demand the return of John Smith! we demand the return of 67AutumnLeaves! Russian: We have no one in our system with that name we must not of took him.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

And then, when 67AutumnLeaves grows up, he can be offered a chance to be injected with super soldier formula and chase Shoigu to the gates of Hell.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

But Bradley is OK, I assume.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

How about naming the kid Dynamics, and setting them up early for a nice and lifelong military career? Because one day that name might make sense.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Five kids named atacams clustering around the swingset…

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago

Essess Kay Moskva

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Have some aspirations, name her Eff Thirtyfive.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Eff would actually be a decent name. Easy to spell and quick to say/shout. Little Эф. Подбирать ваша игрушка, Эф!

IIRC they don't really do middle names, though, because they already have patronymics.

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

But mah freedom of l33t speech!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm expecting MST3K references. Don't let me down, edgelords.

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