this post was submitted on 04 Oct 2024
956 points (95.8% liked)
memes
10103 readers
1722 users here now
Community rules
1. Be civil
No trolling, bigotry or other insulting / annoying behaviour
2. No politics
This is non-politics community. For political memes please go to [email protected]
3. No recent reposts
Check for reposts when posting a meme, you can only repost after 1 month
4. No bots
No bots without the express approval of the mods or the admins
5. No Spam/Ads
No advertisements or spam. This is an instance rule and the only way to live.
Sister communities
- [email protected] : Star Trek memes, chat and shitposts
- [email protected] : Lemmy Shitposts, anything and everything goes.
- [email protected] : Linux themed memes
- [email protected] : for those who love comic stories.
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
I don't think anyone doubts furries are nice people. The issue is the perceived degeneracy. Most people assume, from media mostly, that furries are fulfilling a sexual component of their lives when they become their fursona. This is reinforced by niche furry sexual fetish art and memes online that get signal boosted either by the creator themselves or by trolls trying to generate more furry hate. That juxtaposition of (again, perceived by normies) sexuality with what appears to be child friendly mascot play, makes people super uncomfortable. That, and the off-brand fursuits and people somehow identifying with a blue fox with anime eyes is pretty different and people hate different.
Yes, and people perceive homosexuality as degeneracy too. It applies to both. Homosexuality is also not about sex. You can never have sex your entire life and be gay.
Yeah I mean, I agree, but yeah, people just hate others outside of their tribe. Personally, I do find furries a touch strange. Kind of big Theater Kid Energy, but I also subscribe to live and let live.
Not sure about what you mean about not being gay if you have sex your whole life though. Homosexuality, as well as heterosexuality is literally about sex. It's sexual orientation.
It's about who you love, not just who you have sex with. Two women who are asexual (don't experience much in the way of sexual pleasure) who have a long term committed romantic relationship may not technically be "homosexual", but they are definitely seen and treated as such. And I think the term "gay" very comfortably applies.
You can have sexual orientation without ever having sex. For example you can be heterosexual and never find a sexual partner - that doesn't make you asexual, you're just a heterosexual virgin.
Yeah, I can see that. The weird thing is, why the fuck are others giving a shit about what the fuck I do? It turns the conversation on its head when you ask what they are into.
I'm a fur for the happy cuddly sfw stuff, but I also want to bury my knot in an adorable subby boy too. I went all-in on both halves of the fandom basically as soon as I found out about it, and I've never been apologetic or put up with any shaming. And there's nobody who would pass up the opportunity to double their penis length and girth, grow a thick knot, have badass razor-sharp teeth, jaw muscles to go with it, can hunt and defend themselves without any outside object assisting them, and also have the aura that comes with it, just walk in the room and the mood immediately shifts. At least, no top/dom. I'm sure bottoms/subs are out there that want to feel helpless and vulnerable. But subs aren't the people that are being little bitches about what I do in my bedroom.
furries get a lot of psychological safety out of embracing animalistic traits in all contexts. Speech is extremely difficult for me and being able to "awooo arf x3 wuf bark!" my way through normal day to day conversations with partners is such an inexplicable relief that I hope people with a passing understanding of neurodivergence can empathize.
For as beneficial as these things are in normal day to day life, it would in fact be far weirder if it didn't extend to the bedroom too. Like play-gnawing a partner to say "I love you" and then getting to the bed with them and just saying "ok for this one thing in particular I am a normal human who doesn't howl!!!"
That would be fucking weird right?
Idk it makes me kinda uncomfortable tbh, so maybe my insight is useful here? Not that I'd stop them from doing their thing in private or at a con I won't be attending, but I would like to stay as far away from that shit as possible personally. Here's my reasons, some of which of course won't apply to every furry, like all groups they're not really a hivemind, but..
-The anonymity is cool, but to a degree anyone in a mask or full suit (be it a shiesty, clown costume, etc) outside of common events like Halloween immediately makes me a bit wary, sure probably nothing will happen but also if they do commit some crime they'll be harder to identify out of that costume. The only benefit furries have over others here is the cost of those suits, that'd be an expensive costume to have to ditch, but at a con they can blend in in the suit ("Idk the guy who stabbed me was like...some blue dog or wolf thing, goddammit." Lol)
The fact that they insist it isn't sexual, when it clearly is at least for many. It gives me the same "don't involve me in your kinks" feeling like if I saw a dominatrix and her sub licking her heels in a McDonalds, and the fact that for many it is sexual means that the ones that are "just for fun" get caught in that crossfire and make me feel that same gross feeling. Again not kink shaming, just non consensually involving the public in your kinks shaming, as consent is important.
The fact that everyone wants to be an animal and for many that is sexual is uhh...not not creepy. It's sorta pseudobeastiality even if those people say "well I don't really want to fuck a real dog" ok sure, I actually do believe that, but it's still uncomfortably close and I wouldn't be surprised of some of them do.
It seems to have some overlap with the contingent of online people that like to call themselves wolfkin and stuff, like vulpine.club or whatever that masto instance was. I'm not sure how much overlap, but I have seen some creepy shit posted from the individuals there, and the complete lack of reality those people live in is maybe not bad but it is startling and makes me uncomfortable. Again, I agree with their right to do it, but I blocked the instance, ykwim.
That's basically it. Again I'm not saying let's hunt them down lol, I'm just saying I don't want to be involved at all whether it is or isn't sexual, and sharing my personal feelings on why it makes me uncomfortable especially when out of place.
Edit: OH I can't believe I forgot to list the biggest reason!
I've seen these sentiments a lot, usually not spelled out like this though. I think the unease often comes from associating anthropomorphic animals with children's media exclusively. That way it seems scandalous that there is an adult component to the subculture. Pretty much every subculture/fandom has that, of course, but people don't seem to mind as much when it's anime, goths and so on.
In my experience people push back against that characterization because the existence of an adult component seems to make everything else disappear or read as dishonest for some people. There is plenty of perfectly innocent, family-friendly content and we genuinely like it for that, not as a sex thing. Those things can coexist just fine with neither diminishing the other.
If you remove the sex/fetish stuff from the BDSM community you'd really have nothing left, if you remove it from furries you'd still have a group of people who really love anthropomorphic animal characters, just not also in that way.
Also, ew, who goes to McDonald's?
If we just roll with that, what do you think about all the people who fetishize vampires, for example? That's pretty much mainstream now (not just because of Twilight) and it's literally undead, blood drinking, mind controlling monsters.
You'll be relieved to know that most people in costume can't see or hear very well, so you'll have the advantage in a knife fight.
Yeah, in open groups with tens of thousands of members you'll have some bad people, not really surprising is it? Look at anime, comics, warhammer, .... anything nerdy and not-so-nerdy, they are there too.
That might be part of it, I have to admit people who want to fuck rainbow sprinkles or whatever that MLP horse's name is are also similarly creepy to me. I almost can understand if the cartoon is more humanoid but, like people who were going crazy over rule 34 of that cop rabbit? Dude..little weird, and not in a good way.
I agree those things can coexist, but when for a significant portion of the people it is sexual it is going to taint the meaning naturally. Especially if there's not really a clear delineation, like for example: diapers. There's many people (guaranteed most diaper wearers and I'm only talking adults), for whom it isn't sexual. If you see an old guy with a puff in his pants, you can assume pretty well he just medically needs them. But it's pretty easy to spot someone who, instead of needing them, is one of those ADBL guys if you see them on the subway. For furries, they all look the same, there is no "tell" like a bib and pacifier. If there was, I'd only be creeped out by the sexual ones, but I just can't tell, and the pageantry of it all just makes it all feel more like the ADBL crew.
Oh no I'm not saying "no kink allowed ever," that'd be crazy! I'm just saying "keep kink behind closed doors (at least reasonably, like, a sex club is technically 'public' but it's obviously OK, I mean like not at the park lol.)" Fair about McDonalds haha I haven't been myself in years, just an example of a public place where it's reasonable not to be subjected to others' kinks.
Yeah I do also think the vampire fetishists are pretty creepy, or can be especially depending how into it they are. Bloodplay is actually one of my few hard No's (along with scat because ew, and gun/knifeplay because not "safe"). But if they just want me to wear a cloak and bite their neck a little, and maybe say "I vant to fuck your butt" in a fake Romanian accent, I can work with that (well, can I without laughing remains to be seen lol).
Lol, the stabbing part was more of a joke, and as I said that isn't exclusive to furries but anyone with a full mask/full costume, but since furries fall into that category they're included, the anonymity does make it hard to report things, (which IRL would probably be like they grabbed someone's butt or something but sexual assault isn't as funny as stabbings as far as jokes go).
Very true, but it seems like it's a larger proportion than normal, though I must admit that could simply be because there are more say comic fans than furries, so the nazis are better drowned out, maybe. Still though I've seen enough that on the rare chance I do see another furry in the wild (well, I'll probably just stay away, but barring that) I'd have to figure out if they're one of the horny or racist ones before I feel comfortable with "ah no they seem like a...well not normal person but at least they won't hump my leg or bust out a 'roman salute.'"
How does that even work, btw? The nazi ones are all blonde dogs? Do they hate people who dress as rats/mice? Do they say "the scalies will not replace us?" Lmao sorry I can't resist making fun of nazis here and there haha.
What do you think about other groups then? There's plenty of people cosplaying characters from media, sometimes in a very tame way, sometimes very much not. Those can be the same people, in the same outfits, minutes apart. You have people cosplaying Princess Leia in basically lingerie, is that alright?
[Insert words of judgement here]
Nah, they are just your average white supremacists except they also have a fursona. It doesn't have to be intermeshed like that.
Surely you can see that dressing up as a character like that is different from furries. First of all, there's a lot more people that do that specifically for "halloween" or "for this photoshoot" or "for a con" than "let's go to Target on March 07th dressed as Slave Leia and do creepy stuff" which, yeah, I'd have similar questions about wtf was going on if that was a thing that ever happened. Like yeah if I go to comic con or whatever and people are dressed like comic characters? Ok. If I go to furcon or whatever and see furries, cool. If I go to the coffee shop and see either a furry or someone being creepily sexual as some comic person, you betcha I'm equally creeped out either way. Idk why it seems to be hard for people to parse.
"Ah, you vill not judge me for my kinks, bleh bleh bleh, vatch me suck ze blood from my victims in public, I don't care if you think ve should take it somewhere appropriate! Watch us do ze Mash, ve do ze Monster Mash right here in front ov everyone."
And yeah probably but that's less funny.
Okay, but when do you see people in fursuits just walking around in public? I can't think of a time. I don't think they are involving people in their kinks. Not most of the time anyway.
I mean it only happened once so far, but it was still weird, and it seems to have happened to others as well since I've heard others talk about running into furries in public. Just because it hasn't happened to you doesn't mean it hasn't happened to anyone y'know?
But how does this compare to "I don't care what they do in their own bedroom, but I don't want to see two men holding hands or kissing in public?" Because it really doesn't feel much different to me. Was the person you saw simulating sex at the time or just wearing a fursuit?
They were doing that "cute anime girl" type thing, idk, so maybe? Frankly, to refer back to my dominatrix example, I don't care if say this guy that comes up when you search "guy licks boot on subway" insists it's not sexual it's just because he has an oral fixation and I'm just sexualizing it, the people who do it sexual reasons have ruined it for him and it now carries connotations of a sexual nature. So a furry doing odd egirl type shit in public, whether they think it's sexual or not, comes off as such and gives me the creeps. It is what it is.
Gay people can also go way too far with sexual shit in public, there's actually a huge debate within the community about whether or not kink should be at pride events for example, and I'd say wearing a whole furry suit is more akin to wearing leather or latex BDSM gear than "holding hands or kissing," and your example is frankly disingenuous.
Sorry... you're comparing someone doing a "cute anime girl" thing in a fursuit with licking boots on a subway?
That's ludicrous.
You have an unnecessary word at the beginning of that sentence which shows your biases.
Also, if someone wants to walk around in dominatrix gear- as long as they aren't violating any local nudity laws, why do you give a shit?
This. People should be allowed to wear what they want. Even revealing things. It's not a crime to have a sexy/ugly/fat/average body. People should learn to ignore what people look like and focus more on their behaviour and values. Focusing on the attire makes people freak out because DIFFRENT!
Yeah, I really don't get it. It hurts no one for those people to just exist in public spaces. I'm only surprised the "what about the children?!?" card wasn't played.
If people want to go out in public like this, I don't see the problem. I probably won't stand there watching them, but it's not like I stand there watching people in general.
They're not spreading any body fluids around, everyone is consenting, I'm just not seeing the deal here.
It's not unnecessary, you brought it up! Why do you specify gay people kissing or holding hands then in your previous comment? Unnecessary to you right back then. So much "no u." You can't direct a conversation towards gay people just to claim that the guy replying is unnecessarily talking about gay people, that one is on you.
But yes, straight people, like MY ORIGINAL DOMINATRIX/SUB EXAMPLE, and the video I sent of the man licking a woman's boot, can also do creepy stuff. Try and keep up. Jfc, you have your sights set on trying to pin me as a homophobe so bad you can't see that I've been the one talking about straight people doing the creepy shit all along while you brought up the gay angle.
And because involving people in your kinks against their will is creepy whether your bits are showing or not, exhibit A: man licks boot on subway. Just do that shit in private (or private enough public locations, like a bar, con, club, etc). There's places for that, the subway, park, store, whatever, ain't it.
Why do you think I specified it? To show the bigotry you aren't aware you have.
No, I am showing how you are being the same as homophobic bigots with people who have other ideas of what attracts them. If you said something racist about Asian people and I compared you to someone who said something racist about Native Americans, that would be an apt comparison.
Do you not have a neck? Do you not have eyelids? No one is forcing you to look at someone in dominatrix gear if they're out in public. This is ridiculous prudishness.
Why? Because you don't like to look at it?
I don't like to look at sweaty, shirtless middle-aged guys walking around when it's too hot. It disgusts me when I see it. Should my disgust be catered to or should I just put on my big boy pants and cope?
Exactly, trying to paint me as a homophobe, by pretending people wearing fursuits is the same as homosexual people "kissing and holding hands" rather than closer to wearing leather or latex. Last I checked homosexuality isn't a fucking costume but by all means imply it, that's your bigotry you aren't aware you have. Again that's on you.
This is a farce lmao, furry != gay, you're operating under a false equivalency, gay is not a fetish and you equating the two is frankly WILD.
Lie. I explained what I was doing.
Because it is no different. It doesn't hurt you either way.
Again, other than you personally finding it disgusting, what is wrong with it? Do you think society should cater to your whims?
Kink in public being gross isn't just a me thing lol, it's a pretty widely shared opinion, just because you want to subject others to your kinks doesn't give you an automatic "I'm not being a creepy gross asshole free" card.
Again, I'm not saying we should imprison them or something like you seem to think, I'm just saying you're gross, creepy, and an asshole for subjecting people to your sexual behavior in public.
And, as I have tried to explain to you more than once, many people feel that way about gay people. In fact, if you go to pretty much any southern U.S. state, you could definitely call it a widely-shared opinion.
And most people don't care if you think they are gross, creepy and an asshole as long as you don't treat them like shit in return. Which is the issue here- people treating furries like shit. Always. For existing. Because, like you, they think they are gross and creepy.
And, on top of that, as I pointed out, some people call others furry as an insult because there's another F- word they know they can't use. But they have no problem using it when they know they're around fellows.
Kissing and holding hands are widely accepted for straight people to do in public even amongst homophobes.
Amongst non homophobes, this extends to homosexual people.
Wearing fursuits, BDSM leather, latex, etc, is a large sexual step above kissing and holding hands, and are not comparable to those regardless of the sexuality of those kissing, can we at least agree on this? If not we have nothing further to discuss.
Here again in your last bit you attempt to paint me as a homophobe. I have a feeling we're done here dude, you are just full of bad faith arguments and hot air.
Let's add that kissing and holding hands is not acceptable even for straight people in some parts of the USA, which I find very sad.
Kink shaming, unfortunately, IS a thing.
So did they have sex? Or were they just wearinga costume? The behaviour is what counts.
i think this whole dialogue is just, fucking stupid to be honest. If we want to complain about porn, and NSFW material, we should be banishing the entire fucking human race to death instantly because the porn industry is a massive mover of money.
The fandom with the biggest sex positive scene is literally humanity. Who gives a shit what furries do. They just happen to very sex positive and open about things, as some people do. It's both hyper sexualized and extremely wholesome. It's just the duality between those things that confuses people.
Funny example of this, on the image board e621, you aren't allowed to leave weird sexualized comments. You get banned for that. But you can also post the most heinous NSFW material ever there as well assuming it abides by the rules (which is basically just "drawn furry art")
this one is interesting, but from my experience and understanding, otherkins are completely different and irrelevant to furries, i would probably argue that there is an expected negative overlap. TBF there is probably some overlap, but it's probably similar to overlap between for example, car guys and minecraft players. Rather than like, car guys and professional racers.
No see again, where porn is acceptable is at someone's house, not in public. The people on the train do not need to see you watching porn whether you're cranking it or not, and whether it's furry porn or not. Again if I go to a furry porn website (or even if I scroll by a thumbnail on a regular porn site) I'm not gonna be saying "oh shit what are furries doing here," I'm saying if I see furries at like, the park, or the train, or Best Buy or some shit, then it's a problem. I can just not go to furry cons or sites and block the masto instances and stuff, that's not a big deal. And maybe I should note I'm talking about them being like suited up in public, not just out in regular clothes. I think that should be obvious based on what I've said (and because how would I know without the suit) but it may be worth noting.
It really feels like some people replying stopped reading before "in a McDonalds." At least that's better than the people trying to justify doing their kinks in public, the fact that a bunch of people in full costume can't respect consent as much as the BDSM community can isn't really comforting.
Interesting to note about the possible overlap or lack thereof, and possible correlation but not causation, thanks for your insight on that!
nobody is arguing for this? Public obscenity laws exist for a reason.
are you comparing fur suits to literal porn? If so, then i may argue we ban all public display of sports attire because i find it distinctly related to sex.
If you see a furry in a mcdonalds, they're probably buying food because their hungry lmao. It's not like it's some weird BDSM psyop.
that's what im here for, np
I am relating fursuits to BDSM leather, gimp suits, pup play gear, latex, etc, yes. Sports attire clearly doesn't fit this category, save maybe the cheerleaders of course I suppose. I was talking about fursuits in public from the get go, in the quote you quoted me in fact. You brought up porn, that's why I responded about porn in public. Seems maybe you're one of those people who don't bother reading what they're responding to?
How eat with suit on? Why not just not wear the suit in public? At least the gimp while being similarly inappropriate in public despite your protests can unzip the mouth, that just seems like added difficulty to me.
Fursuits are not revealing or sexy and the people in them are not putting them on only in cases they want to have sex. It's not connected like that.
that's like relating halloween costumes to BDSM gear. Or like i said, sports jerseys.
That was literally the point lmao.
yes. for an irrelevant reason
fursuits are not porn, public indecency is not porn, and fursuits are not public indecency.
take off the head.
they don't? Like most of the time? Whenever you see a furry in public chances are, there's a fur con, if not, they're probably not causing problems.
you have to be trolling
I've never seen a furry having sex in public or acting in any obscene way.
To be honest I dont see anything productive to this insight, you are just talking through your own silly meaningless prejudices where you can't resist sexualizing the totality of an identity in order to rationalize your disgust for it, nor can you resist casually associating said identity with the potential for violence.
It is a bit like picking your nose in public, no one is really interested in seeing it.
See you're doing the thing where you insist it isn't sexual, despite it clearly being sexual for many, maybe not for you, but in essence you're attempting to gaslight me by pretending it's on me for "sexualizing" people doing shit like this which is clearly meant to be sexual. Like, just look up "furries" and scroll around images, a decent amount are going to be vaguely creepily sexual like that, or whatever the fuck this is. But yeah, that's all my imagination, right lmao.
By the way I forgot to mention that an insignificant portion of them are like, actual literal nazis, but add that to the list. Knew I was forgetting something.
The hilarious thing about your argument is that it applies to cisgender heterosexual white men better than it does to furries.
Not that it was a good argument in the first place, it seems like you are unable to confront how narrow your view of the world is.
I've said multiple times that this applies to all people, I even included an example of a straight couple exhibiting similarly creepy behaviors in my very first comment.
Frankly it only applies "more" in that there are more "straight people" than furries (which, by the way, is not a sexual orientation. First of all if YOU are to be believed "it isn't sexual" so how the fuck can it be a sexual orientation? Hmm? And second of all there are gay furries and straight furries etc, the sexual orientation is separate from the type of BDSM, latex, fursuit, or leather dog mask and chain an you're wearing.)
Narrow nothing, kink is fine, but it isn't appropriate in public. You just want to subject people to your kink against your will (which btw flies in the face of safe, sane, consensual.)
"Narrow nothing, kink is fine, but it isn't appropriate in public. You just want to subject people to your kink against your will (which btw flies in the face of safe, sane, consensual.)"
I agree heterosexual cis gender white men have a huge issue with not getting consent! They should really keep their creepy kinks (like for example domestic abuse or racism or making creepy unsolicited comments to women... and girls) out of public spaces.
Wait, so you're fine with domestic abuse, racism, and making creepy unsolicited comments to women and girls, as long as it isn't in public where you're subjected to it but kept behind closed doors? Huh, well this took an unexpected turn. So, you're one of the nazi furries I see.
Most of society is saying that men doing those things is bad and they should stop, not using them to justify their own immoral behavior subjecting others to their kinks without consent. "Criminals rape people so I should be able to ignore consent too" really isn't a great position to hold.
Btw, sexual assault, racism, domestic violence, and catcalling are not "kinks," something is seriously wrong with you. CNC is, but the first C stands for consensual. Raceplay is, but that also is only between two consenting adults, the rest of the train doesn't need to hear you call your SO the N-word. BDSM sometimes can involve slapping or paddles and the like, but again that is between consenting adults, the train does not need to watch you smack your girlfriend around even if she says "thank you sir may I have another." Catcalling, idk, humiliation or praise kink I guess? Still only ok between consenting adults. Seeing a pattern here? CONSENTING ADULTS. Your absolute disregard for consent is frankly concerning.