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Got lucky but couldn't get it up. Should I apologise? (lemmy.world)

submitted 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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Got lucky with a girl I met through a friend's girlfriend that I am absolutely in love with but I couldn't get it up when things got heated. Stayed over at hers but didn't even get morning wood the day after, only semis over night. Also haven't had a boner for 3 days now.

She's actually texted me back more than once after the incident, so I think she might still be ok wil me, but I feel like I should apologise or something. I don't want to force things but I also don't want to lose her. Should I apologise?

Also I've looked at porn for like 13 years and was getting unwanted hard ons with no effort literally the same week this happened. And I tried looking at porn later (to check if it was porn brain) and my dick remained soft until I touched it (even then it wasn't like like it nromally is). WTF? Could I have got ED literally the one time I was on the verge of getting laid? Safe to say, I will not be looking at porn again.

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I know there are no studies regarding porn and sex drive, but it can desensitize you. Speaking from experience here (and I know that’s anecdotal). Not saying it breaks your equipment or anything. To quote my doctor, “at the end of the day, an erection is arousal + hydraulics, basically.”

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

Masturbating too much can desensitise you and I definitely agree with abstaining for a day or so if you want to make sure you're ready for a partner. It really doesn't have much to do with porn use though. I think it's important to separate those two concepts and not use porn as a proxy for talking about masturbation.