curiousaur

joined 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (24 children)

I met my wife at a bar. We've been married 4 years now.

She walked in alone, looking beautiful. Made up, red lipstick, hot dress.

I was shooting pool in the back with some friends before we head to our friends dj set. She sat down in the front, nearly by the door. I handed my cue off to someone and said shoot for me, I need to take care of something.

As I walk towards her, I can see every other single dude, and the not single dudes, and a couple of ladies eyeballing her. I walked with such momentum that anyone considering trying to make the move had already yielded. I walked with such confidence they probably thought I was already with her.

I sit next to her and start chatting. Ask if I can buy her a drink. Introduce myself. Ask what she's up to. Turns out she's trying to go dancing. She was supposed to meet a friend who was running late, but the dance club accross the street they were going to had closed suddenly a few days prior.

It just so happened that my buddy was DJing the best, sold out, ballroom dance party that night. And I was on the list.

We have a few drinks and chat, convince her to come with us if she's trying to dance. She gets in the Uber with some of my other friends I was shooting pool with and I. The friends there and candid vibe set her at ease, it is a little crazy to jump in a Uber with someone you met 30 minutes ago after all.

I get to look so cool when I tell the bouncer I'm on the list, but there must be a mistake I should be listed for a +1 too. No problem, we both get in. It's litterally the best dance party I've been too. We dance, make out, the rest is history.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 weeks ago

It's probably why they fought to keep her in prison. They don't want her talking, opening up lawsuits.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Who had the ARs?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

I like croak way better as the English representation.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 weeks ago

They fucking lied to me. It is absolutely not foot activated. I even jumped on it and nothing.

Watch, I can probably run over it with my truck and not set it off.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

That's why they went for the supreme court first.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 weeks ago

It's racism. Always has been.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

The best chapstick is enough water.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 weeks ago

I don't know how to tell you this, but America isn't at war with them.

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Of course the fucking Mormons are trying to own it.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

They trusted Russia. Fatal mistake.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 weeks ago

I think it might actually be mustard.

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