Fighter_Moo

This is probably a strange suggestion, but have you tried using Fear? I've noticed it's somewhat easier to be social after consuming any kind of scary content.

There's a modified Chinese proverb I like that goes something like this:
Watch your emotions, for they become your thoughts.
Watch your thoughts, for they become your words.
Watch your words, for they become your actions.
Watch your actions, for they become your habits.
Watch your habits, for they become your destiny.

Basically the takeaway is that your emotions/attitude aren't the end point, they're the start point. The pattern in your comments keep reading of Self-Loathing. That emotion is forming itself into your thoughts and words. Anger management techniques are critical to controlling this metaphorical "curse" you're under.

Bunch of songs from Laufey and Creepy nuts playlists.

Thank you to Dan Soza. It's always good to know there are people that care so deeply about protecting the vulnerable. The fact there are so many sane individuals out there, like Soza and fellow lemmings in this thread, pushing back against the delusion brings a comfort to my soul.

Pretty good, all in all. I'm making some strides into figuring out how my mind works. That's been letting me do stuff I used to struggle with, like commenting online and riding rollercoasters. Plus I feel a lot more productive and healthier now.
A relative in the military is visiting for a while. It's been nice getting to hang out again.