this post was submitted on 12 Mar 2025
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[–] [email protected] 5 points 15 hours ago

Death by simulation crashing.

Or if going by the actual username and not the display name: Death By Air Conditioner Crashing On My Head Beacause I'm Too Indecisive To Choose Anything

spoilerAka: The Chidi Death

[–] [email protected] 5 points 15 hours ago

....that last step will be a doozy.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

Mine's pretty open-ended.

I'm going to go with gassing in a concentration camp for opposing the fascists.

History repeats itself.

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (1 children)

The US actually does invade, and I die in some kind of defensive gambit where they take more casualties than us.

Unfortunately, that's a vibe killer now, because it doesn't feel totally impossible and we still like each other. Sorry.

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[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 hours ago

Choked to death by the Canadian Prime Minister.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 16 hours ago

A remake of Alien but with a meerkat

[–] [email protected] 1 points 10 hours ago

His name is Candy and he has a good shot.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 14 hours ago

I’ll donate so much to research I won’t have money to eat?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Jesus Christ, that'll be gruesome...

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 16 hours ago

Alcoholism.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 16 hours ago

Mine unlocks the cheat codes from Jedi knight 2. So probably dismembered by jedi or sith spawns

[–] [email protected] 7 points 17 hours ago

At least I would know what was coming, three would come before me.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 16 hours ago

I choke to death while alone, try to self heimlich and fail. My body is found half eaten by my cats with my cold, dead hand still clutching the offending cheese toastie.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 16 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 16 hours ago

Like mathematician August Ferdinand Möbius, at 77, in Leipzig?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 17 hours ago

Hey, somebody left some perfectly good Swiss on this block of wood. How convenient, don’t mind if I d….*

[–] [email protected] 17 points 21 hours ago

The fucking Russians, of course.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 hours ago

A 60ft wave off Mullaghmore, Ireland

[–] [email protected] 16 points 20 hours ago (3 children)

Either heart goes out during orgy, or torn to shreds by an uprising

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 17 hours ago

A very large child does something in such a way that I would die.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 21 hours ago

Silently hunted down by a mysterious lone wolf.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 17 hours ago

Nihilistic fruit

[–] [email protected] 5 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 2 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago)

Having the time of my life

[–] [email protected] 6 points 17 hours ago (2 children)
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[–] [email protected] 12 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

A detective stands over my lifeless body, Detective Salvitore is panting for air, desperate to catch up to her partner and mount the hill. She reaches the crest covered in sweat, vision blurring but enthused at the grim sight before Detective Glassgow.

Salvitore fumbles for her radio, wheezing a shaky "We... we... I... found-" before Glassgow cuts her off.

"Save it Sal, I already told them we found the vegan."

[–] [email protected] 6 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

Thor dropping a mountain on my head.

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Some kind of ancient forest spirit emerges from the woods, consumes my soul and leaves my body in a coma before fading back into the trees without a trace.

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago)

Raptured by the One True Dog

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 hours ago
[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 hours ago

Shmurdered Murdered....

[–] [email protected] 7 points 18 hours ago

It will be a hell of a party!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

Inviting my Farmville girlfriend over.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 15 hours ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

My character makes a sandwich. I reach for the peanut butter...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 16 hours ago

In front of my PC without anyone noticing until days later

[–] [email protected] 9 points 19 hours ago

Derogatory slur

[–] [email protected] 3 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

By a spear, then repawn after 3 days

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 13 hours ago

I get ackshually'd to death in the comments. 💀

[–] [email protected] 5 points 17 hours ago

Well I'm named for a fictional character I wrote about. so presumably she comes to life and for some reason tries to kill me

[–] [email protected] 9 points 19 hours ago

I'll leave it to you, reader, to guess the "where" it is cast

[–] [email protected] 5 points 17 hours ago

Mind control cereal

[–] [email protected] 7 points 18 hours ago

Well... I can tell you who didn't do it.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 19 hours ago

Wrong place wrong time during a controlled demolition

[–] [email protected] 10 points 20 hours ago

Furiously stroking my willy.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 17 hours ago

Chopped into several large pieces. But it will be awesome.

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