this post was submitted on 01 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 63 points 2 weeks ago

An SEO specialist walks into a bar, saloon, watering hole, place to get drinks, neighborhood bar, dive bar, best mixed drinks, beer on tap...

[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Damn. Need to wrap that whole bar in a try: except: that just silently fails. Solves all the issues and you go to another bar.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 2 weeks ago

In my experience silently failing just leaves you standing there waiting for your beer forever, or until someone reboots the universe.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

“But if it silently fails then we won’t know there’s a problem until a customer reports it and we go looking for it!”

Yes, and that could be weeks before it becomes my problem again!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago

And weeks later, after that change has been rolled out to all the bars, the engineer now has to travel to every single one of them to fix it.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Customer: Can i use the bathroom?

Bartender: Ehhhh our bathroom is not available at the moment.

Customer: What?

Bartender: Not. Available...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

def bathroom(customer): return False

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

Exception:

Spits out entire codebase

[–] [email protected] 22 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Thank god, finally a bar that sells lizards and kills people who spend to much time in the bathroom, this place is perfect.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

I'm reading this while sitting on the toilet. Do I have anything to worr... Oh fuck! I'm on fire! Help!

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

lesson: santize your bartenders inputs but also use hierarchical rbac to provide guests access to querying for amenities.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

A developer walks into a bar and orders one Budweiser'); DROP TABLE bartenders;

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 weeks ago

A table falls over and drops on the foot of the developer

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Isn't it weird that their job title is QA Engineer when their goal is to break stuff?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

QA Terrorist?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago

Who else is going to engineer the tools to break stuff?

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Did they order Bobby Tables beers though

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago

Bobby ordered beers for the table, stack overflow caused them to black out

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago

Don't forget to order null beers, and " DROP TABLE * BEERS

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I've played enough games to know that he definitely forgot to check for integer overflow errors.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 weeks ago

that's the big number