this post was submitted on 01 Nov 2024
625 points (97.6% liked)

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 6 days ago

An SEO specialist walks into a bar, saloon, watering hole, place to get drinks, neighborhood bar, dive bar, best mixed drinks, beer on tap...

[–] [email protected] 44 points 6 days ago (4 children)

Damn. Need to wrap that whole bar in a try: except: that just silently fails. Solves all the issues and you go to another bar.

[–] [email protected] 27 points 6 days ago

In my experience silently failing just leaves you standing there waiting for your beer forever, or until someone reboots the universe.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 days ago (1 children)

“But if it silently fails then we won’t know there’s a problem until a customer reports it and we go looking for it!”

Yes, and that could be weeks before it becomes my problem again!

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 days ago

And weeks later, after that change has been rolled out to all the bars, the engineer now has to travel to every single one of them to fix it.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Customer: Can i use the bathroom?

Bartender: Ehhhh our bathroom is not available at the moment.

Customer: What?

Bartender: Not. Available...

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago

def bathroom(customer): return False

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 days ago

Exception:

Spits out entire codebase

[–] [email protected] 22 points 6 days ago (1 children)

Thank god, finally a bar that sells lizards and kills people who spend to much time in the bathroom, this place is perfect.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago

I'm reading this while sitting on the toilet. Do I have anything to worr... Oh fuck! I'm on fire! Help!

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 days ago (1 children)

A developer walks into a bar and orders one Budweiser'); DROP TABLE bartenders;

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 days ago

A table falls over and drops on the foot of the developer

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 days ago

lesson: santize your bartenders inputs but also use hierarchical rbac to provide guests access to querying for amenities.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 days ago (2 children)

Isn't it weird that their job title is QA Engineer when their goal is to break stuff?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago

QA Terrorist?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 days ago

Who else is going to engineer the tools to break stuff?

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 days ago

Don't forget to order null beers, and " DROP TABLE * BEERS

[–] [email protected] 13 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago) (1 children)

Did they order Bobby Tables beers though

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 days ago

Bobby ordered beers for the table, stack overflow caused them to black out

[–] [email protected] 6 points 6 days ago
[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 days ago (1 children)

I've played enough games to know that he definitely forgot to check for integer overflow errors.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 days ago

that's the big number