this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2024
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bonus question:what does it mean to be too online anymore?

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[–] [email protected] 111 points 3 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago

πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

[–] [email protected] 73 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Sometimes I see people rant about people in a way that makes me believe they rarely interact with anyone face to face. Complete lack of anything positive to say about others, can only discuss topics that mean something to themselves, no ability to put themselves in someone else's shoes.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 months ago (1 children)

.........you're describing Lemmy users, aren't you?

[–] [email protected] 34 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Lemmy, reddit, 4chan... You find them all around. If you ask me, it's likely caused by childhood isolation. Kids who grow up in a tense environment or with certain disorders tend to be outcasts when growing up and this creates a bitterness towards the world.

It feels unfair that there is a way most people behave towards one another that you can not be a part of. And it's always easier to blame the environment than to look inward, find out what is causing these feelings and how to combat them. This is easily said when you're past your 30s, but a 7 year old kid does not have the capacity to do this level of self reflection. So the effects of being an outcast compound. At some point it just becomes easier to direct your anger at faceless strangers and avoid any kind of real social situations. And this, of course, also compounds.

But that's just my armchair psychology take on it. I have been somewhat of an outcast up until college (although not nearly as bad as some other kids I've met). College was an eye-opener for me due to the acceptance and positivity that was around everyone. I noticed quickly that the happiest folks where the ones who spoke mostly of things they liked. It's a cliche for a reason, but a positive attitude breeds positivity.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I think Lemmy is better about this. Certainly better than Reddit or 4chan. I think because of the small community. There are people itching for a fight or to troll, but by and large I've had way more positive interactions here than negative. I think when a community gets sufficiently large, it gets exhausting dealing with so many bitter, damaged people that civility is forgotten or civil members remove themselves as self-care.

I definitely agree with your last point. Everyone is uplifted by positivity.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

I agree Lemmy contains more positivity. I would like to nominate the folks over at Stop Drinking for a positivity award. Also the communities that share wholesome moments. But for most of what I see, it's bots posting news.

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[–] [email protected] 48 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They spend so much time on Lemmy that they start replying to their own comments.

[–] [email protected] 70 points 3 months ago

I can relate to this one.

[–] [email protected] 41 points 3 months ago (2 children)

When they seem to think it's socially acceptable to scroll while hanging out with other people. I usually give the benefit of the doubt--"oh they're responding to a text....... right? oh damn, they are scrolling? and I'm sitting right here with them?"

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

yea, that's not great

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[–] [email protected] 29 points 3 months ago (4 children)

If they frequently reference memes IRL, says "lol" with their voice, complain that you don't answer messages immediately, sit idle in a voice chatroom, notices the the typo, anime profile pic, uses x.com.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

I see what you did there

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Well, tbf, I say β€œlol” IRL, but only when I’m mocking people…

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I didn't notice a typo... :(

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

You didn't see the the typo?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

I don't know what that link is, but I won't be clicking it since I'm at work. Talk about sus

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Well I have a simple formula just for this:

If they believe things I believe, like things I like and go to the web pages I do: they're a productive, well-socialized chad ubermensch patrician. No online issues there, even if they spend 24/7 online they must need it.

If they don't believe things I believe, don't like the things I like, and go to websites I avoid: they're too online, probably an incel too and likely a terrorist in the making and sorely need to touch grass and should have their internet connection stopped.

spoiler/s

[–] [email protected] 23 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Constantly referencing TikToks/Insta reels

Unironically talking about YouTuber beefs

The only jokes they’re capable of making are meme references

Their phone’s photo album is practically empty or only screenshots

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Their phone’s photo album is practically empty or only screenshots

hmm

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[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

A number of tells. Here's my shortlist.

  • Missing work, school, or other important obligations. Basically neglecting responsibilities.
  • Preferring online interactions over face-to-face ones. On the phone all the time, even when with people.
  • Anxious, irritable, or depressed when not online
  • Losing track of time while online.
  • Sleep deprived.
  • Not sure how to answer when asked how much they're online

Don't ask how I know...

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago

Nice try mom! I'm still not cleaning my room. Stay off my forum.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I once ran out of questions I could answer on OKCupid.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I noticed that a lot of my friends who are really online think that everyone will always agree with them.

My theory is that this happens because they are used to their algorithm only showing them content/comments of things they agree with and since that makes the bulk of interactions with other people, they think everyone is like that.

Also dehumanizing people who they aren't politically aligned with. I think that people who "touch grass" more often, deal with people all over the political spectrum so they can separate the human side from the politics side.

These are just my theories btw I don't have evidence aside from my anecdotes. A sample pool of like 10 people lol so clearly not enough

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[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 months ago

I dont know anymore, been here too long.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

They use Lemmy

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

Sending me news links that are social media posts containing a link to a news article. Especially if it's from Xitter: no way I'm logging into that place just to see replies.

It tells me that they didn't read the article and that they expect me to care what the shit posters reacting to the headline think.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (4 children)
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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

They keep rambling on about jeans and beans even though you stopped contributing to the conversation several minutes ago...

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Sometimes I hear a remark during a conversation that just seems out of place, but is said with the air of a proverb, and that's how I know it's a reference to something popular on social media and that for me is too online.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 months ago (2 children)

When they know who pedobear is

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Could that also be a sign that the person is simply older?

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm always online myself and I don't do any of the things typically memed about with people who are "terminally online." Shit might have made sense back when the only way to be online was with a computer that you couldn't just pop out of your pocket while standing in line or taking a shit. With smartphones, though, you can literally be online all day while also living a life.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago

When they are actively livestreaming themselves.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

Whatsapp Web: Synchronising Messages. %0... %1... %2...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The question lacks depth of perspective. Human social needs are a fundamental part of life. The question lacks an understanding of the range of circumstances some human experience. Also, this perspective can be degrading and demeaning to someone such as myself that experiences nearly complete social isolation due to physical disability.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Sorry. This is why I included the bonus question:

what does it mean to be too online anymore?

This wasn't included in jest but in recognition that for many now there isn't any too online, it's simply the means of socializing, among other things.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

What condescending claptrap. Degrading and demeaning? If you’re always online because you’re disabled and that’s the only way you can interact with people, then you’re not too online, are you?

Verbosity and hair-trigger outrage, however… yup, that smacks a bit of being too online.

Get off OPs back, dingus.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago (2 children)

Verbosity and hair-trigger outrage

What condescending claptrap. Get off OPs back, dingus.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

Y'all dinguses quit acting like dang doofuses

Edit lol laintrain commented "cringe" on a joke comment that is clearly stupid wordplay

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[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

I do enjoy irony. I'm not always sure whether someone is in on the joke or not, but I enjoy it either way.

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