this post was submitted on 24 Jun 2024
922 points (98.8% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26718 readers
3695 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 107 points 4 months ago (3 children)

We really should start celebrating T u e s d a y s.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 4 months ago (5 children)

Tuesdays are the most productive day of the week. Not a time for celebration, its business time.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago

All the more reason to reduce productivity. Flatten the curve, lower expectations. Tuesday is the scab of weekdays. The other days need to strike.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago (2 children)

could we celebrate wednesdays instead? tuesdays are my weekly catered drug intervention with my mother.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Throw a dead horse into the mix and we have a party.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

You really can’t beat a dead horse as a reason for a party.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago (1 children)

It wasn't Tuesday it was T u e s d a y. I am assuming it's like a normal Tuesday but in some uncanny valley creepy form.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

my bad! on T u e s d a ys i'm actually totally free so

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (2 children)

I heard that line in Bill Wurtz voice for some reason

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago

Truly the voice of several generations.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 51 points 4 months ago (5 children)

Do you think they'd cater a horse funeral?

[–] [email protected] 22 points 4 months ago (1 children)

What?? NO! Don't be silly. Where did you even get such a crazy idea? Are you even serious right now??? I mean, I have no words... A horse funeral, who even does that!

[–] [email protected] 14 points 4 months ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago

Horse funerals are not a joke, Jim!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago

Wait, what?

Jim is back in town?

Roll up all barrels from the cellar. Today, we feast and drink!

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago

Bye bye lil sebastian

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago

Only T U E S D A Y S

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago (1 children)

They do horse funerals and horse funerals, but I doubt they'd to horse funerals.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

They only do anniversaryies of horse funerals

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 44 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago) (1 children)

Horse funeral

Horse funeral 2

Horse funeral: truly aww-foal

Horse funeral: equinity

[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Like beating a dead horse.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 months ago (2 children)

You both stop that shit right now

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 38 points 4 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 4 months ago

Honestly, if I ran a catering business I might put up the same sign. What's the worst that can happen? 3 horse funerals?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

OOOHHHH so THAT'S where that pre-cracked egg comes from. I didn't know that was a whole joke account and store.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 4 months ago (2 children)

A catered quiet night alone sounds pretty dope actually.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Waiter comes up with a tray: pig in a blanket?

Me half stoned laying in bed: the fuck did you call me?

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

Catering companies would love to bring you food for 10 people and the plates to keep it warm for your quiet night alone. All you gotta do is pay.

[–] [email protected] 30 points 4 months ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago (1 children)

They should have put that one above the second horse funeral.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 4 months ago

Jim is the horse

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 27 points 4 months ago (2 children)

This just unlocked one of my weirdest childhood memories. I played fastpitch softball as a kid, and at one away game the school's softball field was next to a pasture. During warmups and the first several innings, we watched a guy dig a hole in the pasture. In the second inning or so, we hear a gunshot off in the distance, and the third has a truck dragging a horse corpse to the big hole. The man shoved the horse corpse into the grave, and takes three innings to bury the horse.

At the team huddle after the game, one of my teammates said an eulogy for the horse.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago

I think we've made some great progress today, don't you? How does next Tuesday at 11 sound for our follow up.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago

That’s brutal…

I went to a middle school that sat next to a farm. A number of our athletic matches were canceled due to the cows getting out and one was canceled because the farmer shot a coyote on our baseball field & left it.

[–] [email protected] 25 points 4 months ago

Careful. Read their reviews online and I'm not so sure about this place. They served deviled eggs at the return of Jim and everyone knew Jim hated eggs. Some people argued this was even why Jim left again and didn't stay returned.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Jim is back? Why didn't anybody tell me? Is he doing fine?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Jim the horse? I'm afraid I have bad news for you.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

The horse his name is Jim

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago

Finally, someone to cater my horse wedding with drugs on a quiet Tuesday night!

[–] [email protected] 13 points 4 months ago (1 children)

Bye... Bye... 🎶 Lil' Sebastian... 🎶

[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 months ago

I miss him in the saddest fashion.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 4 months ago

"For You, The Day Bison Graced Your Village Was The Most Important Day Of Your Life. But For Me, It Was TUESDAY"

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 months ago (1 children)

"You know you don't need to bring a dead horse every time you want catering right, Jim?"

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 4 months ago (2 children)

Can they do an horse funeral on a Tuesday? It's not clear from the text.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

LMAOA, that reminded me of one of the teaser clips for that ol' Supreme Commander 2:

Supreme Commander 2 - AC1000 Gunship Trailer

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago

Ya gotta laugh.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 months ago (2 children)

If they bring a mariachi band I'm sold

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›