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Resources for moving out of state or country. (lemmy.ml)

submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I am hoping to move ASAP and have no idea what I'm doing.

Does anyone have any guidance? I've never made much money in my life so I'm nervous about that.

I want to move to the West Coast and know it's more expensive there. I want to be somewhere LGBT friendly. I like nature and paddle boarding too... So it would be cool to still be able to do that.

I don't know where to start. When I look for apartments it's always about ...1 or 2 apartments in my price range in an area of hundred of thousands of people.

I'm kind of unsure about looking for a job. I typically suck at interviews and have been the type to prove myself via hard work vs selling myself to an employer. I'm a pretty quiet person and it takes a lot for me to warm up to people and I find this to be a bad trait for employment. Ime it seems social people get picked first regardless of work ethic.

Idk any advice would be great. Like steps to be broken down so I'm not overwhelmed.

I want to avoid areas of crime, and prejudice. I also enjoy people that are down to earth more than what I consider wealth, trend and privilege.

I make about $14.50 right now....... lol-fml.

I wish dorm style living was a thing.

Thanks in advance for any info.

Edit: in terms of our of state... I'm thinking Vancouver CA or Toronto. West Coast would probably be Cali, OR or wa.

I'm somewhat open to East Coast south of Maryland.

Also, I'm in my 30s.

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[–] [email protected] 62 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

I would not move across country without a firm job that can cover your expenses. Especially if you have no social network to support you. This is how lots of people become homeless.

So start there, look at where you can find work, maybe make some phone calls, send emails, etc. Then once you have a sense of how much you’ll be able to make you can look at what housing is available to you. But realistically, surviving in expensive places with the amount of money you currently make may be quite difficult. Keep in mind that many of the very lowest cost apartments you see may be scams.

Also, consider looking at some cities closer to home. There may be some pockets of lgbt friendliness in your region that you aren’t considering and they may be lower cost of living. The places you listed are all extremely expensive and not necessarily somewhere you can just move without a plan.

I know everyone hates Reddit here but once you start to narrow things down, it might be helpful to ask specific questions on local subreddits to get input from locals.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

This comment has the best advice. Unless it's dire need, moving is not in the cards for OP Here.

OP, hard reality check, you do not have the finances to afford a move, let alone living. Take it from me, I live in WA, and even with a decent tech salary it is still incredibly expensive to live here. Hard facts, a cheap apartment in the Seattle area will be over $2,000 a month. We're talking out of the way, hour commutes into work, it's a place. Minimum wage is higher here, but not by much. Assume you can get a job at $16/hour that's 125 hours of work a month dedicated to just rent alone. (Not counting taxes, and of course things like.. eating)

Which is, of course, impossible.

To get here alone we spent $8,000 in movers, not counting gas, hotels, and other items to get here. Then if you don't have work you need several thousand per month for each month you are not working to cover food, rent, etc. I think we spent about $13,000 in total moving across country when it was all said and done.

We also flew out here to see apartments before we moved too, that is also an extra expense, so tack on another 2 grand for flights, hotel, etc.

You need a plan, and not a plan for once you get here but a whole plan. The whole ordeal will be a months long process, and several of those months will be without income. If you are in the spot you claim, then you just simply cannot do it.

I get the drive - the need to move. I grew up in a small town and it was suffocating. It's not impossible to get out, but it requires a lot more planning then just "I need to move", which is why I feel for you.

The only steps for now are to start saving. If the drive is real then you'll be able to save the money. Get a second job. Work overtime. Save every dime to get yourself out. Start building a plan. Working retail out here is possible but it won't be the dream of moving across country. Maybe look into community college or other ways to learn new skills that would be in demand, that would help move you out because you'd be able to land a job across the country and move for it.

If the drive to move is real, the passion and motivation will be there to accomplish those goals.

Years sounds like an eternity, but if you start today then you can have the realistic goal of "4 years from now I want to be on the West Coast". That's accomplish-able. Trust me, I did it, you can too.