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Is it wrong to put your career first and push getting into a relationship further later? (lemmy.world)

submitted 2 days ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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I don't get it. Everywhere I look there is this discussion about getting into a relationship, getting gfs/bfs and constantly chasing after it. And I'm not doing anything of it. I never paid attention to such stuff. During my teenage years, I thought it was normal attraction which people cave into and pursued such things. But now in my 20s, the same thing I observe, if not a little bit more than I used it. People getting sad because they are not finding someone. People being happy because they have one for themselves.

I'm not that career focused either. I just mind my own business. If it's studying or working, I just mind that. I do nothing like checking out girls in my school/workplace like my peers do. Maybe I'm just scared to pursue such things. I also think having a relationship is a huge headache too. Meeting them, making them happy, going out with them regularly. (I don't go out myself where will I take her to?). All of this while doing your daily stuff.

Am I wrong thinking to put career first before I get into relationships and stuff?

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 day ago

I think part way into your post, you started leaning away from the question but I digress.

I haven't dated in 2 years going 3 but that is simply because there's too much going around me internally and externally to where I simply can't afford a relationship. A relationship is starting to seem like a luxury of its own, in a way of like investing into it. If you don't have anything in order in your life, why should you get into one? Because once you're in a relationship, you are always spending in some form. Spending money or time or both, usually both.

Just try to avoid potential partners that want to date you because you're succeeding in whatever career you pursue, because success can attract moochers and that's something you don't want that'll bring things down. There are some people out there that do find people who're focusing on careers or goals attractive and may want that since they're also doing the same thing. Maybe that's your type.