this post was submitted on 09 Nov 2023
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[–] [email protected] 105 points 1 year ago (4 children)

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they talk on the phone ~~like this~~

[–] [email protected] 62 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they talk ~~on the phone~~

[–] [email protected] 54 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine meeting the love of your life ~~and then finding out they talk on the phone~~

[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine meeting the love of you~~r life~~

[–] [email protected] 30 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine there’s no rest of the sentence. Then who was phone???

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Oh my god bear was phone! How can that be?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Don't hurt me, no more

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out she breathes.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago
[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

Imagine meeting the love of your life and then finding out they're a real living human being.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

God I wish. I hate having novel length text conversations. Texting for one off quick or cute sentences. Telephone for detailed conversation.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Imagine meeting the phone of your love and then finding out they talk on their live like this

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Imagine meeting the phone of your dreams and caressing it lovingly and leaking bodily fluids..

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's how you get a bloated battery STD ...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Damn, that reminds me, I should replace my own battery soon. How do you replace human batteries though? 🤔

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Idk, I've been running on emergency auxiliary power, even diverting power from life support, for years now. Lights are getting dimmer now.

Obviously I lack a built-in charging capability, so taking the batteries out just means shutting down before replacing them with new ones.

But others are suggesting cocaine. It supposedly boosts you lithium ions (I assume), and also postpones the memory effect of, em, li-ion batteries.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

If you're running on auxiliary power, you should eat the phone by now and conserve your calories. Make sure to boil your urine though. Stay safe, if you need assistance you can always call [redacted].

/s

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

This voids the warranty, unfortunately

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Meet the love of your life and then imagine taking