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I actually use Nginx. The major advantage is if you have to access something directly. For example a client app in your device wants to access a service you host. In that case Heimdall won't be enough. You can still use ip with port, but I prefer subdomains. I use Nginx Proxy Manager to manage everything.
Regarding the network going down, the proprietary part of the tailscale is the coordination server. There is an open source implementation of the same, called headscale. If you are okay with managing your own thing, this is an alternative. Obviously the convenience will be affected.
Apart from that, if you haven't already read this blog post on How tailscale works? I highly recommend reading this. It gives a really good introduction to the infrastructure. Summary is your connections are P2P, using wireguard. I don't think tailscale will have a failure scenario that easily.
I hope this helps.