this post was submitted on 05 Apr 2024
872 points (98.3% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26777 readers
3054 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 161 points 7 months ago (1 children)

They probably know they're in the running

[–] [email protected] 68 points 7 months ago (2 children)

Yeah. If you're in the top 10, you definitely have a suspicion.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 7 months ago

My gut tells me that top 10 list changes daily. 💀💀💀

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (3 children)

If someone is eating that much mayo it'd have to be daily, and I think if someone eats mayo daily they'd know they're eating a lot

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 113 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (15 children)

I bet they do know it.
I bet there's an online community somewhere with several hundred competitive mayonnaise eaters.

Edit: Yup. I guess this needs some kind of warning. Don't click if you don't want to see someone empty multiple big jars of mayonnaise with a spoon in under 3 minutes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_INKqoqDYsk&t=232s

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

Considering how mayo is like half oil and half egg, I bet those people take the nastiest shits imaginable. Pure liquid that smells like Hell itself.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

I highly suspect it comes out the other end shortly after being ingested. Unless there are rules against that or something. Somehow, I feel like the mayo-eating professionals aren't exactly well regulated.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I thought I could do it. I really did. As soon as that first spoonful hit her mouth though, I was out.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

You are not missing much. She just does that over and over again for the next 5 mins or so. Almost 2.5 kg of mayonnaise (that's 5.5 lbs)

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

yeah just about 9500-10k calories, nbd

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Thank you for the video. I watched in awe and gagged occasionally. Can recommend.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Ok, sure, that's a lot of mayo. But I didn't think OP was referring to an amount consumed in one sitting. Surely there's someone out there that just loves macaroni salad or coleslaw who ends up eating way more on a longer timescale.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Chances that these competitive mayo eaters also love mayonaise enough to put it on those foods you mention is pretty high

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Either that or mayo has become a day job and they can't stand it outside of competition.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago (3 children)

There is absolutely NO WAY I am going to click on that link!

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Make your choice, adventurous Stranger.
Click the link and bide the danger
Or wonder, 'til it drives you mad
What would have followed if you had.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 7 months ago

She was not the Hutt I imagined before clicking the link. For a moment there I even thought it wasn't going to be gross.

And I can confidently say she surpassed the amount of mayo I've had in my entire life, by quite some margin too.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

me trying to prepare myself for the video: It's just yogurt. It's just yogurt. It's just yogurt.

Eating starts

me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

And what better to wash down over 2 kilograms of mayo? A tall glass of refreshing lemonade.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (7 replies)
[–] [email protected] 48 points 7 months ago (2 children)

No, he knows. Mayonnaise Georg. Hell of a guy.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 7 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 44 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 30 points 7 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 29 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (2 children)

This is true for real life too

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 24 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Fact: someone has eaten the most mayonnaise in the world

Cannot be stated as fact: they don't know it

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

At least they can never be 100% sure that they are.

Because even if you think you are the person who ate the most mayonnaise in the world, there could always be someone that ate more who doesn't know.

Thus noone can ever truly know if they are the person who ate the most mayonnaise in the world.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) (2 children)

That’s true for Miracle Whip too, and that stuff tastes like goblin cum (or so I’ve heard from a “friend”).

[–] [email protected] 18 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Nah, it doesn't even come close to the nuanced flavour of goblin cum.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago (5 children)

You should try Miracle Whip sometime.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Its whoever inspired the making of this guy.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 17 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I am afraid to admit that I can finish a sizeable jar of mayo in 2-3 days less sometimes, but I don't do it every week I promise... Please stop calling me out. It's just comfort food I swear

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago

Oh I know it

[–] [email protected] 11 points 7 months ago (4 children)

My friend has a story about a coworker who would bring a tub of mayonnaise into work and mix it with tuna and sometimes chickpeas for lunch. He wouldn't finish the tub every day but he would go through a lot of them every month so I think that guy's in the running.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago

Nah it’s my wife. She knows.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago

Oh they have a pretty good idea. They're currenlty in post-op recovery in a cardiac cath lab getting sternly reprimanded by their doctor that balloon angioplasty can only do so much and this person has to make lifestyle changes or they their heart disease will end their life early.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 7 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

Well thank you kind sir. This is something I did certainly not want to know. Anyway - pass me the off white jam

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

I nominate my ex. So many times I’d take a bite then spit it out and be like ‘you didn’t!’

Yes, she did

Last one was mayo on a fucking McGriddle. I’m still traumatized

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure it's The L.A. Beast

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Or maybe Shoenice

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago

Chile and their heart attack inducing hot dogs... and suddenly I want one.

load more comments
view more: next ›