this post was submitted on 23 Mar 2024
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Omar going crazy (sh.itjust.works)
submitted 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago) by [email protected] to c/[email protected]
 

This is a joke poster made by Alan Wagner on Instagram, and the events described didn’t actually transpire. Alt text:

A photograph of an A4 poster tacked to a white wall, titled “Notice from Landlord” in red capitals. Below the title, the poster reads “As you know, I place fresh berries in the berry bowl each morning for your enjoyment.” A photo of a white wooden open-top box attached to a wall is shown on the poster, with a small paper label reading “Berry Bowl” taped to the wall behind the box. Inside the box, an assortment of strawberries, blueberries, plums and green grapes are visible. Below the photo, the poster reads “Well, did you know that I use an AI camera to track who takes which fruit?” Two photos from a security camera mounted on the ceiling are shown side-by-side, each showing a different resident of the building reaching into the box to take a fruit. In each photo, a green rectangle frames the resident’s head, with a label showing the name of the resident and the type of fruit they have taken. The left photo reads “Devon, 3 blue” and the right photo reads “Carleigh, 2 Straw, 1 Grape”. Following the photos is a section titled “Last Month Rankings”, which reads “Most blueberries, Devon, 56 blueberries; most grapes, Shannon, 23 grapes; most plums, Omar, 27 plums; most strawberries, Chris T, 9 strawberries”. Below the rankings, the poster reads “No-one’s in trouble, I just thought it would be fun to let everyone know the ranking 🙂”. At the very bottom of the poster, a footnote is written in white text on a black background. It reads “I use the data to know which berries to buy. It’s fine for me to do this. If you live in my building I can use your data.”

all 35 comments
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[–] [email protected] 128 points 7 months ago (2 children)

What an amazing landlord, I'll make sure to tip extra well this month.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago
[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

Person of land*

[–] [email protected] 107 points 7 months ago (3 children)

The fact that the "camera" in this is shown as detecting people taking "3 blue" and "2 straw", obviously with "-berry" being implied, makes the natural conclusion that the camera is also detecting "1 grapeberry". And now I want to know what a grapeberry is.

[–] [email protected] 40 points 7 months ago (2 children)

What bothers me most is calling a plum a berry.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Yeah they have plums and strawberries on there, neither of which are berries, but no bananas?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 7 months ago

Salacious slandering of stonefruit, surely.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

Ah, it must be the fleshy bit surrounding the grape nuts we utilize for cereal. Everyone just spits out the nut part after eating it, they then separate it out during trash recycling and add them neatly into boxes for your enjoyment

[–] [email protected] 94 points 7 months ago

The bottom text in the black bar is crazy lmao.

[–] [email protected] 64 points 7 months ago

If this where digital instead of in real life this is common practice. And everyone accepts it. IMHO this is a great comparison.

[–] [email protected] 46 points 7 months ago (1 children)

This is obviously fake. Plums ain't no berries, under no definition

[–] [email protected] 19 points 7 months ago (2 children)

They are, under the botanical definition, but the poster is using a very broad definition of berry then because strawberries aren't botanically berries lol

[–] [email protected] 60 points 7 months ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

It's fine to use the scientific definition when talking science and the colloquial one in everyday usage but neither include plums

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (1 children)

In botany, a berry is a fleshy fruit without a stone (pit) produced from a single flower containing one ovary.

wikipedia

Plums have stones.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 7 months ago

I suppose you're right, I misread lol

[–] [email protected] 45 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Mmmm, I love the taste of a fresh GDPR violation in the morning.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 7 months ago (2 children)

I mean, this is one of the few cases where you actually can reasonably say that you might not have to give a damn about GDPR. Assuming this is in the US, there's a high chance that no EU citizen lives in that building, and thus GDPR doesn't apply.

(Yes, I know this didn't actually happen)

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

Might violate California privacy act laws though if this were in California

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago (1 children)

Whst would be the implications if someone were to invite their European cousin over?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 7 months ago

In that case it becomes a violation again. At least according to the law

[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 49 points 7 months ago* (last edited 7 months ago)

Fortunately this is fake, it was made by Alan Wagner on Instagram who goes around sticking up posters like this. If it was real that last sentence would be seriously concerning, obviously.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 7 months ago

Fair play to you, that alt text is one of the most comprehensive I've ever seen.

Accessibility 2thaMAX

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 months ago

If you live in my building it's fine for me to use your data. Err I'm not sure that's how GDPR works. But give it a go there chap.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 7 months ago

Honestly the intricate description you've presumably included for the benefit of the blind and others who would use a screen reader rather than looking at the image itself comes across as more unhinged.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

I love Alan Wagner's stuff. He has such a goofy sense of humor

[–] [email protected] 5 points 7 months ago (1 children)

I can't tell if this is a joke or an actual delusional jobless landlord. Next we are gonna have " I installed ai camera in your toilets to track how many rolls each person use :) ".

[–] [email protected] 15 points 7 months ago (2 children)

If AI cameras are that smart and can identify who takes what from such shitty resolution and terrible angle, we should have lost our jobs a long time ago to AIs.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 7 months ago

I was thinking there were multiple cameras which is fixed onto the box so you can compare before and after images to find the missing or taken berries.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 7 months ago

Or we'd at least have better success in apprehending package pirates and shoplifters.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 7 months ago

Oh this is fucking bullshit.

Chris T. is clearly Jesus mooching again. You know what that motherfucker can do with water, right?