A good start to your plan in terms of subject :)
Trivial critique time:
- Perhaps play with the "Shadow" settings of any luminance histogram tool you have to get a little definition (pupil vs. retina) in Stellar's left eye - e.g. to match the definition of her right (will work best on RAW mode photos).
- Given the distance you're taking this at, it's unsurprising Stellar's right eye, etc. is drifting out of focus due to "Depth of Field" issues, but you could try going to a much higher aperture for more depth of field (e.g. perhaps you are at around F4 try seeing what happens at F20 - though you may run into lighting/ISO issues.