this post was submitted on 21 Jan 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 48 comments
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[–] [email protected] 190 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Unfortunately, the rest of the tweet also isn't true.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 9 months ago (1 children)

He has too much cash to die and his investors won't allow it at this time.

[–] [email protected] 37 points 9 months ago (1 children)

He has too much ~~cash~~ debt to die and his investors won't allow it at this time

FTFY

[–] [email protected] 15 points 9 months ago (2 children)

Debt is better than no money at all

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Yeah, just ask Trump.

Normal people subtract debt from available wealth, but if you have a billion dollars and three billion in debt, you in effect still have a billion dollars. The magic of late stage capitalism!

[–] [email protected] 19 points 9 months ago

The biggest part I take issue with is the word β€œsadly”

[–] [email protected] 166 points 9 months ago

Don’t do that. Don’t get my hopes up like that.

[–] [email protected] 110 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

We should spread new elon death rumors and make what happened more and more embarrassing with each telling.

Edit: I love all of these already, lol

[–] [email protected] 51 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I vote for him pissing his pants, slipping in a pool of his own piss, and then falling and smashing his head against that sink he was carrying in that picture back when he bought Twitter.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 9 months ago (1 children)

I'd start out with heart attack, then add in drug-induced, then overdose, then overdose and found in a puddle of his own urine, etc....

Just progressively more as if more information keeps coming out.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Complications of a failed penis enlargement surgery.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 9 months ago

Slipped in a puddle of piss taking his first shower after a widening.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Elon goes for a Sunday drive in his Space-Tesla, forgets oxygen.

[–] [email protected] 96 points 9 months ago

Clearly incorrect as no one would be sad.

[–] [email protected] 71 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 115 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Here is an alternative Piped link(s):

https://www.piped.video/watch?v=oFBbOHohwR8

Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.

I'm open-source; check me out at GitHub.

[–] [email protected] 54 points 9 months ago

Do you find this helpful?

…yes.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 9 months ago (1 children)

This stuff is back again? A year or two ago FB and the like was littered with spammers posting fake news that some celeb or other had died or met some tragedy to get people to click it. This stuff is annoying as heck, there’s plenty of spammers, but for some reason this particular brand seems very ubiquitous.

[–] [email protected] 55 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's because the sites refuse to police misinformation in any form. You want attention on that, you have to say something that someone in charge of that cares about. Falsely reporting their death is an easy, legal and fun way to make a content moderator or site owner or CEO pause and say "hey wait a minute"

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago

Musk is not going to reflect on his actions. He'll scream, cry, and shid himself before banning them and posting a rant about lying liberals.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 9 months ago (4 children)
[–] [email protected] 40 points 9 months ago (1 children)

It's not official until the is -> was brigade shows up.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 9 months ago

His full name Elon Reeve Musk sounds really close to feeling Deez nuts.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 9 months ago

Fully expected that link to just lead to a picture of an ass. Didn't expect there to be an article about one too.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Well, that's upsetting

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago

His signature looks like a graffiti in Arabic.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Is he the founder of anything?

[–] [email protected] 43 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Yes. Zip2 (as the money), SpaceX (as the money), Neuralink (as the money and the evil), the Boring Company (as the money and con ringleader)

[–] [email protected] 16 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Not sure what Zip2 does but basically he funded 3 companies that are his selfish shit, trying to abandon a dying planet for Mars, Neuralink to upload his mind to evade death, and Boring company for his Hyperloop shit to help sabotage highway rail project to keep Teslas cars to be sold which is where most of (almost all) his money comes from

[–] [email protected] 8 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Zip2 is basically the yellowpages online. I think it's unfair to say he just funded that company. He basically started the initial project (GlobalLink) that turned into Zip2 after a rename that came with a bunch of funding.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Wow, he fucking sucks at renaming companies.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

Well that 3M funding round came from someone else, so he likely didn't have too much say in the rename. I believe he started Globallink with. 28k from emeralds he stole and pawned from his dad. Then he got another 100k later in the story of funding from his dad.

But yeah... he isn't great at coming up with names... after that he started "x.com" which would later merge with another company that forced him to rename it to "Paypal"

I think these details are all correct, but I am remembering from a Behind the Bastards podcasts and some articles I read. It's been a while so the specific amounts might be off a bit.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

for Mars

Let's judge SpaceX for what they are actually doing, rather than a pipe dream the owner happens to have. The company did a lot of things that might be good or bad, but going to Mars is not one of them so it's not really a useful aspect to think about.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (2 children)

Where did I judge the company? Maybe read the comment properly and don't make up things to get upset about, I was talking about Musks motivation for funding these companies not what they do.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago (1 children)

You didn't. Take your own advice.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 9 months ago

I didnt what?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago) (1 children)

You don't even use punctuation correctly, which makes it hard to "read the comment properly". Moreover you don't explain that what you listed are the motivations for starting each company.

funded β‰  founded

[–] [email protected] -2 points 9 months ago

I used funded deliberately mate, I know the difference...

for starting each company.

you see I used funded because Musk rarely starts the company he just comes in with the money...

Moreover you don’t explain that what you listed are the motivations for starting each company.

I mean I literally wrote this

basically he funded 3 companies that are his selfish shit, ...

if that's not clear what I meant then I don't know what to tell you man, go retake English or something.

[–] [email protected] 26 points 9 months ago

Investigators say they found Mr. Msuk face down in a bowl of SpaghettiOs.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 9 months ago

Bet it was auto-erotic asphyxiation.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago (1 children)

Let’s pour one out in memory of our favourite frogfaced overfiend.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 9 months ago

Don't insult frogs like that!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago

Fuck elmo as always. πŸ–•

[–] [email protected] 10 points 9 months ago

He's my favorite zombie CEO and we're gonna ride dune buggies on mars because I said he was a cool dude on the 'net. We call it the 'net, me and Elon

[–] [email protected] 1 points 9 months ago

Is he really dead?