this post was submitted on 22 Dec 2024
56 points (98.3% liked)

Asklemmy

44147 readers
1741 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 

It can be low effort, passive-aggressive, insulting or derogatory towards your convictions.

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 3 points 51 minutes ago* (last edited 19 minutes ago)

About 20 years ago

I went to my family Christmas with my then-partner. I got a Grinch onesie from my family

We then attended my partner's family Christmas where basically the entire living room was stuffed with presents for the kids (my partner and their siblings). My then-partner complained about how the siblings all got more $$ worth of presents. I pointed out that I got a pair of pjs for Christmas. The reply: "it's not about the dollar amount, it's just they got more than me" (paraphrased)

I hated that present. A fucking onesie? It was such a disappointing present, and for a long time I used it as an example for questions just like this

I kept it and wore it. Eventually I lost the bitterness and started to cherish it even. Which is why I still wear it regularly this time of year! It's quite warm.. plus, it has pockets!

Grinch tax:

[–] [email protected] 1 points 39 minutes ago

Mug from Hotspot, probably. It's actually pretty great though.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Not me, but my wife.

She receives an envelope from her grandmother, oh cool, money!
She opened it and it was empty. Okay, no fuss she probably forgot to fill one when making all of them for the family. A week later, she told her grandma it was empty. Her grandma replied "No! There's no way it was empty, your mistaken." This is par for the course. She ignores my wife all the time and talks down to her.

So an empty envelope is the worst I've seen.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago

Reminds me that my aunt gave me 100$ in a box but claimed I threw it out…

[–] [email protected] 14 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

I was deployed and got a box from my home unit that was basically just trash. I think it was supposed to be funny, but it was just a lot of scrap paper thrown into a box. Nothing written on them that was for me. Nothing to signal anything. Just a big box of trash that could have been nothing more than the recycling bin upended into it.

That was pretty heartbreaking.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 44 minutes ago* (last edited 43 minutes ago)

Did you ever talk about it with them? Definitely sounds like an inconsiderate joke. Flabbergasting that they managed to follow through enough to get it posted to you.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 3 hours ago

I had an aunt and uncle who, when I was a kid maybe 12, were not well off. They got my brother and I each this toyset that was like make pretend welding. It had a hand tool that, if I remember, let you weld with this soft plastic to make things with the parts in the kit.

It also had a chamber near the nozzle that spun and contained something that made a bunch of sparks.

Well... The thing kept zapping and burning me. Kinda hurt. So, being 12, I complained about it.

And of course, I was an ingrate for not liking the toy they could afford instead of a Lego set or something. The worst of it was I got what my parents meant, my aunt and uncle were kind of ashamed. But it burned me.

Hell I thought it was really cool, and even said so, but I couldn't keep playing with it due to, you know, my hand being red and kinda cut up.

Just bad times all around.

And no, no one suggested put a glove on, and it did not come with one.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 5 hours ago

Someone sent me what they referred to as a self-help DVD that was just some motivational speaker type of person invalidating my issues. A virus in the DVD also temporarily destroyed my friend's DVD player in the process of playing it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 hours ago (1 children)

Sounds really fucked up of me, but I once had a girlfriend gift me a painting she made for me. I could tell she really tried, took her time, spent money on it, and she chose a subject matter I really liked, but it was absolutely terrible. One of the worst paintings I've ever seen.

It put me in such a dilemma because she even framed it and was expecting me to hang it up at my place but I couldn't bear to hang it and see it 'decorating' my place. I thanked her a lot when she gave it to me but I would've preferred she had gotten me nothing instead.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 hour ago

Did you hang it?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

When I was 7, my grandmother bought a Power Wheel ride-on Jeep for my cousin, and got a little die-cast Jeep for me. At the same family Christmas party. I think my other cousins also got cool shit, while my sister got something small/cheap like I did. Can't remember what exactly, the only details I recall clearly are my cousin's Power Wheel and the gift that I got.

I think grandma and my dad (her son) were feuding at the time or something, and I guess she wanted to be petty by giving us second rate gifts compared to our cousins. It was one of the first times I realized how shitty people in my own family could be.

This was 30 years ago and I still get pissed off thinking of it, even though my dad and grandmother eventually made up, and she passed away almost 20 years ago.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Oh fuck i have a long history of this...

My parents got me a cheap set of tools, pliers, screw drivers, level and a wood burner with no wood to burn at 10. My brother got a gameboy SP and Pokémon.

Two years later I got an electric shaver and Cologne. I didn't start growing facial hair until 17 and didn't have enough to need more than one pass with a razor until 26. Still have the Cologne, it's not awful but it's also not a smell that works for me.

14 I got a store made cake and $20. I can't eat the cake, the frosting makes my face hurt and that's been a problem since I was 5 so they know I can't eat the cake.

Basically, I didn't get a present for me until I met my wife at 30.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 hour ago

damn, that sounds like you were part of a case study in your childhood. Is there a difference with how your brother turned out and yourself? Interested to know if you picked up skills like DIY and stuff while your brother isn't capable of those things.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 hours ago

one of my buddies got a mtn dew. thats it

another got a playstation gift card, which would have been good but he didnt have a playstation

[–] [email protected] 38 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

I received a framed picture of my parents, from my parents. They said it was because I didn't have a picture of them hung up in my house.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 52 minutes ago

Did you hang it up?

[–] [email protected] 31 points 7 hours ago

That's kind of hilarious. 😆

[–] [email protected] 31 points 7 hours ago

At the call center I worked at, our Christmas bonus was a dress shirt with the company logo on it.

My wife wears it when she dyes her hair.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 hours ago

Years ago my father in law gave me a Costco sized flat of Nanaimo bars. Like just wrapped it and that was that. I was so bummed as I thought it was a big coffee table book. I ended up cutting them all in half and freezing them, so we had treats through the year. My husband and I still joke about it. As we passed them in Costco last week he suggested I return the favour.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 hours ago (2 children)

My mother-in-law gave me a booked called The Etiquette Edge which essentially explained how to be polite

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 11 points 6 hours ago

My Dad once gifted me a bazinga shirt. I don't watch the big bang theory.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 hours ago

I was given 30 quarters that had letters and numbers on each one in a black velvet pouch. If you put them in a certain order, it had a message. The quarters went in year order. The message was a Bible passage according to Matthew. It was when Judas was given 30 silver for betraying Jesus.

The context, I told one of our friends that the gifter was trying to get with his wife while he was deployed. He denied and then made me feel like shit to insinuate such a thing. Turns out, it was true.

I still have the quarters so I could give them back some day.

[–] [email protected] 60 points 8 hours ago (6 children)

People keep giving me steak house gift cards.

I'm a vegetarian. I can only eat a roll there.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 4 hours ago

I'm vegan, and my agency gave me a gift card to Zaxby's, and it wasn't even loaded

[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

I’m vegan and the number of people who can’t figure out “no animal products” is astounding. I’m so tired of “no eggs? No dairy?” like yes bitch, I don’t fuck with animals.

People act like it’s rocket science.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

What? Fish is an animal?? /s

[–] [email protected] 7 points 5 hours ago

How could I forget? It always blows people’s minds that I don’t eat fish, but before I was vegan I never liked fish anyway but no one had a problem with it until I went vegan.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

To be fair, the person you're responded to said "vegetarian" not "vegan." But yes, otherwise, it isn't rocket science. My vegan boys are big fans of seitan.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 36 minutes ago

Either way, a Steak House is probably not a place they're interested in.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 5 hours ago

Right. I guess people mix up the two a lot so for me it’s just easier to say “no animal products” plainly.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 12 points 6 hours ago

Top three would be my weird Christmas 'bonuses' from a previous employer. In order of weirdness: some fake notes (representing the companies record profits that year), a single bike pedal, and finally a spanner which had been spray painted orange.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

I've always been a computer/theatre nerd. When I was a teen my parents bought me a bike. I did not express nor have any interest in a bike, but I'm sure my mom felt I needed to go outside more and spend less time on the computer. A week or two later while upset at me about something else she complained that I haven't even used my new bike yet.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 hours ago (2 children)

That sounds a bit petty from you, at least from my POV.

No matter how nerdy you are, going outside is healtht, both physically and mentally. They got you a nice gift, IMO.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 33 minutes ago

They got me something I had no interest in and were upset I wasn't using it. Ever hear the phrase "it's the thought that counts"? It demonstrated zero thought into what I would actually be interested in.

It's like buying a teen a set of knitting needles and being surprised that they didn't start knitting with them.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

Bro upset his parents told him to be healthy and touch grass.

Lenny moment

[–] [email protected] 2 points 26 minutes ago (1 children)

I didn't like a gift that demonstrated zero understanding of who I was or what I would have wanted.

There was no attempt to talk to me about going outside more or getting more exercise, I have always been pretty skinny and reasonably healthy, and at no point did I indicate that I didn't go outside or wasn't active.

But I'm sure you understand my parents and their motivations better than I do.
Lenny moment.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 21 minutes ago

Lenny moment

[–] [email protected] 14 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Not the gift itself, but the response.

First of all, even before Christmas I said I'd prefer NO GIFTS at all. Regardless, my dad got me some inkjet HP printer. I thanked him for it, but asked him that we'd return it. I tried to be respectful, but regardless, he got mad at me and didn't talk with me for like 2 days.

Later he sent me the money for it and asked me to buy something for it and show him what it was. I do not know why I couldn't just keep it as extra money, but oh well, it had to be spent on something.
I got a refurbished ThinkPad for that. Pretty good device, by far beating value of HP inkjet. I even got it with a 2 year warranty (without extended) like with a new device, while only 1 year is required.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 5 hours ago

My mom knows I'm always buying tools for work (electrician) and computer-related parts/devices. She still has trouble wrapping around the idea that I don't want (as much as I sincerely do appreciate the gesture) anything in those arenas due to specificity of requirement, that and most things of that nature tend to be expensive. She still buys little random things from Home Depot, like last year she bought this wrist cuff thing with magnets on it. Great idea on paper, but not in the field. At this point she's getting older so I kinda just humor her.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

I once got a picture of a really cool present from my dad, which he said was in the mail. Never got the present.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 51 minutes ago* (last edited 51 minutes ago)

Maybe it got "porch pirated". I thought I was immune from that until my things started disappearing.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 hours ago

So I’m a trans guy and as a kid I was very obviously masculine, stereotypical tomboy. One of my aunts that married into the family gave me, maybe around age 5-7, a toy makeup kit. To this day I don’t know wtf she was thinking, because it wasn’t like she never met or saw me. Was it thoughtless or passive aggressive? Who can say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] [email protected] 22 points 8 hours ago

My gran once gave me a toilet brush. The base had penguins floating in blue liquid, but it was ultimately just a cheap toilet brush.

I gave her a beautiful marble maze.

I didn’t bother after that.

load more comments
view more: next ›