this post was submitted on 17 Dec 2024
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No Stupid Questions

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I'm NOT the parent in question. Just a FYI.

And by mental capacity, I mean like not just IQ, but also other mental conditions like depression, ADD/ADHD, etc...

Like the child(ren) has not done anything wrong like crime or misbehave, but simply the parent thinking that giving an inhertance to (in their view) a "mentally disabled" child is a waste and "would just end up in the hands of government". And they justify it since they think that "the kid can just get disability income anyways". (Location is USA, for reference)

I personally think this is just very ableist... what do you think? Is it okay for parents to do that?

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[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

It being "ethical" and it being "okay" are two seperate things. Ethics is mostly subjective. Most people would say it is unethical though. It isn't illegal, you have the right to divide your assets as you wish, so that would make it "okay".

Differentiating based on mental illness and your perceived value of a person based on their mental health struggles is plain wrong and not based in reality, unless said person is at a point of needing a caretaker to get by. Especially since a bunch of illnesses are hereditary. Stuff like ADHD can manifest in different ways. My brother is both hyperactive and has attention deficit. I only have the attention deficit part. Both of us lead normal lives. Our parents dividing assets based on the fact that he has it worse on that front, and giving more to me, would be plain wrong and nonsensical. Especially since I'm absolutely shit with money, and he isn't.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago

I can't speak to whether or not it is "ok" unless I have a lot of knowledge of the situation.

I think the fairest way to split an inheritance is by need, although that's not always known at the time of drawing up a will.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 days ago

I think it's their money and they can do anything they want with it.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 4 days ago (5 children)

Yes it's ethical. Their money, their choice. They can donate 100% to a charity you don't like and it would still be completely ethical.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 days ago

tiny bit weird to riff off the “my body my choice” slogan used by women asking for rights for your own finance argument. speaking as someone who doesn’t want that phrase to become old hat or meaningless!

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