Fediverse

I'm a woman, and make no attempt to hide that fact in my posts. That said, I also don't personally have much interest in talking about being a woman, so don't sub to any of those places you linked.

Over on Reddit I just sort of let people assume I was male a lot of the time, since it wasn't really relevant to what we were talking about. But from the start on Lemmy I've made sure to call out incorrect assumptions, downvote and give a talking to people stereotyping or being misogynistic, etc etc. And the more of us (of all genders) that make that same decision, the better things get.

I also mod [email protected] which as you might expect is largely although by no means entirely women. Any questionable comments over there are dealt with swiftly, I am absolutely not having it.

I don't necessarily see it as a "problem" that Lemmy is seemingly male-dominated (I say Lemmy because my Mastodon is very much female-and-NB-dominated). It's more just a fact of early adopters tending to the techy interests that skew male. But if someone does see it as a problem and wants it to change, there are basically two things to do:

1. Make sure you're helping make Lemmy a welcoming place for non-males
2. Invite your non-male friends

All that said, other women may disagree but I don't particularly feel like a minority on here and never really think about it until coming across something gross (which is a LOT less often than on Reddit, thankfully). There may be few enough women that I recognise their names often when they post, but let's be honest Lemmy is a small world and that goes for most regular posters in general.

(And it helps that I'm middle-aged so if any little boy thinks they can upset me with comments about my gender or appearance or whatever, lol, the self-confidence of age is a wonderful thing 😉)

Edit: Just wanted to add, if you're not a man and you're reading this thinking "wow she's lucky, I've had such a bad experience here" then first, I'm sorry you've had that experience, people suck sometimes. But also, drop me a DM let's see if we've got any interests in common and I can maybe signpost you to some more friendly communities and people. Between my two accounts I spend WAY too much time on Lemmy!

I'm a woman and I don't follow any of those communities. I don't have pronouns on my profile so people probably assume I'm a dude. I have seen misogyny called out pretty much everytime, so lemmy is in a pretty good place already imo.

I just want to point out that our fairly optimistic views and plans for Lemmy has very likely specifically attracted trolling attention. We have a target on our backs, because some people just like attacking nice things. Most of the internet is not very nice, so does not need to be attacked. We are trying to do something different though, and that will attract some negative attention whether we like it or not.

Since they want to have a chilling effect on the community, hopefully demotivating some of its userbase, it is necessary to embody a willful refusal to be chilled.

For each of us.

Just a thought, communities dedicated to one particular gender are often not inclusive by design, especially if you actively try to funnel people of a certain gender to certain communities. And therefore they, historically, have tended to devolve into echo chambers, and then subsequently into toxic spaces, with little room for nuanced discussion nor hosting a broad range of opinions. That's not to say all communities are like this and most don't start out like that either. There is value to have these communities if they themselves promote inclusion. But putting people of a particular gender into a gender-specific community is not at all the solution to "Too few women on Lemmy".

I'd rather see the focus on making the general communities be welcoming to everyone equally.