this post was submitted on 29 Aug 2023
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Amazon CEO Andy Jassy warns remote workers: 'It's probably not going to work out for you'::Amazon CEO Andy Jassy told employees who defy his edict to return to the office three days a week that "it's probably not going to work out for you."

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[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 year ago

I kinda hate this shit tbh, what they are doing is paying us less and forcing us to move to more and more high cost areas to work "in the office". I kinda honestly think back to the office is a way to lay off a ton of people with unemployment.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Jassy told his employees that he spoke to scores of other CEOs and that “virtually all of them” preferred having their employees back in the office.

CEOs try not to think they're the center of the world, the challenge.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

"Should workers be subjected to pointless and dehumanizing drudgery that serves no practical purpose? Find out what this panel of five overpaid CEOs think, after the break."

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

In other unbiased polling, the wolf spoke to all the other wolves in the pack and they all prefer that the sheep be eaten.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I spoke with virtually all of the workers, and none of them want to pay rent. Yet here we are.

CEOs can get bent through a videocall

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

CEOs can get bent through a videocall

Found my new email signature ✨

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think my favorite part of the Amazon RTO is the fact that there are many offices that charge you to park there

[–] [email protected] -5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

This is common in dense urban locations; parking is expensive, and getting free parking just for working somewhere is not expected at all.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

Uh, maybe, but it is also typical in healthcare and hospitals regardless of their location so your point while technically true is not valid here.

Source: i worked for 10 years at 4 suburban hospital locations with their own parking lots and i always paid for parking, every. fucking. day.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

That's still not ok. It's just normalized.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago

I’m confused, my comment is not valid because amazon is a hospital now?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Lol, Andy ain't gonna work for me

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Nah, I'm fine at home.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Maybe tech workers will finally unionize

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Too many libertarians in tech. Will never happen.

Source. In tech. Not libertarian.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago

Nah, we're still high on our own farts to realise they can turn foul rather quickly.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago (3 children)

It's the commercial real estate mortgage backed securities market. If everyone doesn't pay office rent the collateralized debt of those places goes kaput, the security implodes like 2008 and the banking industry goes under.

These CEOs are all invested. They don't care about productivity, it's all about saving their investments.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I Say they should get fucked. I don't see why somebody 's bad investment is my problem.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Maybe they should be better business men and should have foreseen this.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)

and the banking industry goes under.

Which translates to the banking industry learning some lessons and becoming more efficient. Yes, please.

Other than that, some drop in realty prices is welcome.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

The only thing they'll learn is the date their next rubberstamped bailout check from the government is going to come.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

More likely that it doesn't work out for Jassy. Certain Amazon units are underperforming under his leadership, and I wouldn't be shocked if his time at Amazon didn't last that much longer.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Who tf would even work for Amazon?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

That's a really nice way of threatening to take away the livelihood and health insurance of people doing work for you.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

The mentality of these people are like slave owners.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

And also start the compensated-hours clock the moment I step into the car. We're giving you eight hours a day, not 12 now.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Gonna need a hot lunch provided, laundry on-site, dog walkers, child care, a gym and a space where I can play guitar when I'm on a break

Oooh you wanted me to give all that up for nothing? In that case you can get bent, get fucked, roll over and get fucked again. I left three jobs over RTO mandates. Every time I left it was for more money. Now I'm at a place that doesn't even have an office, just Google meet and a PO box for physical mail.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago

Get bent, Andy.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 1 year ago

Given how many millions of people must have used Amazon to order stuff to work from home over the past 3+ years, this is a really weird position to hold. You'd think this guy would be all about everyone kitting out their home office spaces.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Amazon employees who refused to relocate near main offices of their teams were told they either have to find a new job internally or leave the company through a “voluntary resignation.”

How dumb does he think people are? This just makes me angry because they're probably going to get away with it too.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

lmao, "voluntary resignation" is hilarious. If you plan to purge everyone who won't relocate, you're gonna have to do a layoff. This isn't one of those layoffs that will impress investors, because it won't represent efficiency or cost savings, but instead corporate dysfunction.

If your workers aren't voluntarily relocating to return to the office, they're certainly not going to voluntarily forfeit their unemployment benefits by quitting. They'll just stop working and wait for the pink slip.

Unless they plan to attach a severance more valuable that unemployment benefits to the resignation, they're fucking dreaming. Even so, that would be a hilarious misstep to offer Amazon employees a voluntary paid exit, because it would undoubtedly result in an unsustainable wave of resignations across the org.

[–] [email protected] -1 points 1 year ago

Why would you quit? Continue working from home while lining up a new job. Or, if they don't specify how long you have to be in on those 3 days, just clock in and go back home an hour later. Game the system, make it work for you. They do.