Autism

Having autism can be quite difficult. We are all in this together. There are people like you going though the same things you just have to know where to look.

Being understood is difficult. I find I'm very intense when it comes to something I'm into. And I talk in long sentences or type walls of text. Those can make it hard for people to respond or interact.

Sometimes you just have to do you and do it with pride.

What exactly do you mean by no one understanding you?

Huh? What are you trying to say? :/ Sorry I was deliberately being an azzhole. I feel the same way you do. But, I stopped caring a long time ago. I never did fit in with other people, and I was never anyone's idea of what a human should be. So, fuck 'em and forget 'em. I'm loving the life I was given, I'm gifted and have traits that make me unique. And I love being who I am, and that's all that really matters. And I kind of like the fact that I get under other people's skin just by existing. It kind of gives me a greater purpose.

Yeah, it's difficult sometimes. My friends sometimes don't seem to get me sometimes but sharing common interest(s) seems to work. Playing games together even if not directly interacting (eg both of us on the same Minecraft server but me building a base and them exploring/mining or playing separate empires in a friendly game of Civilization or Stellaris)

If you want people to understand you, you have to communicate with them what you want them to understand. Explicitly. Don't drop hints or clues, you have to say it outright. People are not mind readers, or even experts in non verbal communication, not even NTs.

Hopefully the person you convey your feelings to is compassionate and empathetic. Be prepared for if they aren't though. Don't be afraid to just drop these kinds of people like a shit in the toilet. Just wipe, flush and walk away. They don't deserve your time.

I seem to understand you just fine, what’s up?

I feel like that too sometimes. It's an overwhelming, lonely, and hopeless feeling that is nearly unbearable. I just end up isolating myself through those times. It can help in the moment so that I don't react in a way that hurts others or my relationship with them, but if I stay isolated for too long, I get even more sad and lonely. It also doesn't give me an opportunity to find people that may understand me, which makes sense at the time because I'm already convinced that no one will anyway. I'm sorry you're going through that, but I'm happy you felt comfortable enough to share here.

If you haven't already, maybe consider joining our chat when you feel better. We have a room specifically for venting and seeking help from each other, along with other rooms for lighter topics. I hope to see you there 🙂

I try everything I can, music, animation, art, programming, even Sports yet no one understands me!

Language!
Seriously, what i found out is that (kind of) everyone "speaks a different language". Unforunately, most people are not aware of this, so the burden is on those who do get aware, to communicate in a language that the other one understands. Autistic people tend to use and understand languages differently, in characteristic ways. More formulaic or more complex, for example -- thus a difficulty arises in translating their idea, say into somewhat more culturally-associative or sequetial/one-dimensional language.

In other words, i think that i understand you! 🥲
The list of things you tried to express in, those can all be taken as different languages, all with their own complexity and levels of formulaity, suitable for communicating different things. I mean for example, that music and arts can be good for displaying emotions and impressions, among other things. Even Sports can convey a lot of practical philosophy.

So, for me it gets interesting when someone says that they are "not understood" but their list of languages they considered to convey their idea does not include verbal language. That is not a fault. Many people and by far not only ND ones don't do well in verbal expression. Some of the most proficient exerts are very good at expressing their ideas in math, but ask them to explain all that in plain language or talk about the philosophical implications and they will fail.

Perhaps you are asking for help with coming toward a "translation", or perhaps it is about finding a suitable way to express. Or perhaps you are asking for someone who could resonate with your way of expression; someone who is able to communicate in your way.

My first question back to/for you may be, could you explain it in words, in what ways is your use of those means of expression you mentioned different/divergent from the way others use them? -- Or is it so that you "failed" in those disciplines at expressing your idea (trying to imitate rather than innovate)? (Did you ever think about it?)
There are ways to going by example also online. One place for such things could indeed be the Matrix chat.

The way in which you use a language or an art differently matters! If only few people understand you then you are doing something out of the ordinary. It might be unfitting in your social environment but it might as well be something novel.

Here is an example from me. When I play my drum then I can tell a story. You bet there is rarely a 4/4 beat in that playing, and it's not just any drum but it's melodic. Rarely there is someone who would inquire about the playing but rather about the drum ... because the technical seems to be talked about more easily than the dramatic, idk. And rarely there is someone who could follow, as the way is intuitive; I never play the exact same thing twice.

I'd also ask you how old you are. It's because more lifetime brings more experience and less lifetime brings less expectation. ... I'm a fourty-eight year old boy who sometimes has something coming through in an odd rhythm on his very own kind of drum, and who sometimes writes multidimensionally, and who makes a distinction between "I" and "i". And something that i am actually quite bad at but anyway -- i'm coming to a conclusion that it's better to seek the right people to communicate with, than trying to make everyone understand. Trying to explain all that in words might fill books, so it might be more easy to find someone who can understand and follow the drum.

I don't think expecting people to understand you is the right mind set. You have to understand them first, why they're unable to see what you want them to see and guide them to understanding.

Easier said than done but my point is that we shouldn't blame others for our own inadequacies

I don't think I have autism either, but I'm just different. I like most people, but most people do not like me and I have no idea why. I'm as nice as can be, and don't have angry outbursts or unpleasant habits and I'm very friendly. I'm just not most people's idea of what a guy should be, though i don't know why. I'm not effeminate or anything, and if I were, I don't see anything wrong with that anyway. I just don't fit into their ideal picture of what a person should be for some reason. But, I do have good friends who are loyal and I do have plenty of fun just doing what I do - so it's all OK.

mood

I find in life that some people get me and some people don’t. I try to surround myself with people that do understand me. I know I’m different, but everyone is different. Just have to find the right kind of different. :-)

I can't read all of them but I can tell you're being very helpful :D