this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
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[–] [email protected] -3 points 11 months ago (12 children)

You might want to look up what patronize means, in the common phrase "don't patronize me" it's used sarcastically.

Essentially, replace the word with "helpful" in your sentence, and you'll see why it doesn't fit.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 11 months ago (10 children)

yeah, I get what you mean. But it's still mostly fitting in the way I feel about it. Basically: users can think for themselves. They don't need me to take care of the bit scary world out there.

Doing so for a whole instance feels super condecending. "I know better than you what you want. I'm going to block it"

[–] [email protected] -3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (9 children)

I get what you meant, which is why I replied, I'm saying that that word means the opposite of what you intended.

To patronize someone is not a bad thing, the word means "to be someone's customer/patron" and through doing so, supporting and helping them. That's where patreons name comes from, for example.

In the phrase "don't patronize me" it's used sarcastically to say "I know you're trying to help, but please don't" but the word doesn't actually refer to someone who is going over your head to do things for you. It's actual meaning is 100% positive, and hence confuses what you're saying. Which is that blocking threads should be done by users because it should be their decision.

Instead, your final sentences literal meaning, paraphrased, is "a server-wide block would be really good and helpful for all my users".

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I don't know if it's perhaps a regional thing but, in the UK, "being patronising" is used pretty much exclusively in the pejorative sense, with a similar meaning to "condescending". I don't think I've ever heard (in actual conversation) "being patronising" used to mean someone is giving patronage, in fact - we would say someone is "giving patronage" or "is a patron" instead. We also pronounce "patronise" differently, for whatever reason: "patron" is "pay-trun", "patronage" is "pay-trun-idge" but "patronise" is "pah-trun-ise".

It seems the pejorative use of the word dates back to at least 1755, too, so it's not exactly a new development.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 11 months ago

in the UK, “being patronising” is used pretty much exclusively in the pejorative sense, with a similar meaning to “condescending”

It's the same in the US, and has been ever since I can remember. No idea where this person lives that the positive meaning would be the first thing they'd think of.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

What about patronising as in 'patronising this business'? A little archaic, but I do hear it from time to time, usually with the 'pay' pronounciation.

Then again, if someone is accusing me of being patronising (which happens a lot for reasons I don't quite understand, but I digress), it's split odds whether I'm "pah-trun-ising" or "pay-trun-ising".

English is weird (perhaps this is its wyrd?)

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