this post was submitted on 28 Nov 2023
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The way myself and my party does it is we play every other week on Saturday from 6pm to 10pm. This way everyone knows the schedule and can plan around it. If people can't clear their schedule to play then we replace them. It's harsh but it's the only way I found to play D&D consistently.
And I myself have excused myself from a game because my life schedule changed and couldn't keep the commitment I had previously and it would be too much work for the rest of the party to change their schedules.
Harsh but fair. It ensures that everyone can work their schedule out in advance, while also presenting clear expectations for participating in a voluntary hobby. Is there a consecutive number of missing sessions before being replaced? If not, how does the DM work it out in the campaign?
You have to be harsh, otherwise nobody gets to play. When we started our new group we made sure to inform everyone that playing DnD is not to be treated as a secondary hobby that can just be canceled for other stuff all the time. Make it your priority, plan other things around the sessions if you want to play with that group. Of course, any emergencies excluded but otherwise treat it as if it is your sport club training. If you miss too many sessions, you're out.
I know this sounds super arrogant and mean, but it's the only thing that works consistently. Also filters out friends who are not ready or able to commit that much time for playing.
I only run west marches style games now. The pcs need to be back in town by end of session or miss out on carousing or possibly worse depending on where they are. Each game is self contained so people can drop or join as they want.