this post was submitted on 17 Apr 2025
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[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Firefighter is a terrible career, better to change to being a nepotism baby asap. If you see an expensive car rolling down the street jump in front and hope they adopt you or pay for college.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 weeks ago

They're more likely to back up and finish the job if you leap in front.

Stick to blackmail with at least one dead man switch they're aware of.