this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2024
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[–] [email protected] 60 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Tampons absorb to grow thicker and then staunch the bleeding by blocking it. It's literally called a tamponade.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Tamponade is what they drink in hell on hot days.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

Is that like a bloody Mary?

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Tamponade is what they drink in heaven on hot days.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I thought it was what vampires drank on a hot day.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

A vampire walks into a bar. The bartender asks if he'd like some blood. "Just hot water, please," the vampire responds. The bartender raise an eyebrow, but goes to get the hot water. When he places the mug in front of the vampire, he says, "I thought you were a vampire. Why order hot water?" The vampire pulls a tampon out of his bag and says, "I'm having tea."

You're welcome.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)

When you tell this joke in person, the crappy vampire accent is a must.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 week ago

My mental voice for that is Vladislav from Among the Shadows

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

They were invented to plug bullet wounds in wartime after all, until nurses noticed they had other practical uses as well.

Don’t quote me on that though, I don’t remember where I read that.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Tampons have been used to manage menstruation for thousands of years. In the 1800s they first started trying to used them for bullet wounds. So they weren't invented for bullet wounds.

Also, just to be clear, don't stick a tampon in a bullet wound. They are not at all an effective dressing. In all cases you are far better off just holding a wad of gauze or similar over the wound and applying pressure. A tampon isn't large enough and doesn't go deep enough to do any good as packing.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 week ago

isn't large enough and doesn't go deep enough to do any good as packing.

Story of my life.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

And if you squeeze it into a glass it's called a kool-ade

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 week ago

What a horrible day to be able to read.