this post was submitted on 18 Nov 2024
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[–] [email protected] 81 points 3 days ago (5 children)

Want to know what’s fun? Watching your friends decide who’s fleeing, who’s arming up, and who’s lying to themselves. Welcome to queer communities in a red state in November 2024. Gods have mercy on us

[–] [email protected] 36 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Stay safe. Leave if possible.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Already in the process. My wife and I committed to leave on the 6th, and are currently packing. Our lease ends in the spring and at that point I quit my job and we move to a blue state (already have arrangements).

Oh and I got a passport two years ago. I’m living by the understanding that if you wait to flee until you absolutely have to, you may not be able to. Better to take some risks for safety that may just be better choices regardless. I’ve always wanted to live in a coastal state, I’m a little excited when I let myself forget the devastation that’s coming.

[–] [email protected] 15 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Well, congratulations on the upcoming move! I hope you like seafood, because as someone who has always lived in coastal states, having all the fancy regional fresh seafood around is really wasted on my dull palate. XD

My friend: "I found this really great seafood place, a little hole in the wall, let me take you."

My friend, after eating: "What do you think?"

Me: "Tastes like... fish?"

Don't like crabs, don't like lobster, don't like most fish... I wasn't born to live on the coast, clearly.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I’m a pescatarian for the same reason some people give up all meat but bacon lol. I love fish too much to stay stuck in Ohio. My wife hates the stuff though lol.

And thanks, I’m very excited in part because we picked the city in question because a good friend lives there, and I’ve already found out it has all the things I love about my current location or at least close enough. We’re also a little excited because it’s closer to my siblings in law and we’re probably going to become aunts in the next few years so it’ll be good to be closer to the kids for extra spoilage. I just wish the move was more “hey this is crazy and we’re some of the least reckless people around but sometimes you gotta” instead of the “we’re afraid that if we don’t do this we may find ourselves tragically regretting staying”

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Eyyy, glad to see I'm not the only one planning to leave Ohio; I'm eyeing the west coast myself, CA State job benefits look very attractive but I'd rather get any job (fully remote or in person) first and try for a state job later.

I need to get with my landlord this week and see about changing my lease renewal to month-to-month, since it doesn't technically renew till January.

I'm mostly done getting rid of all the junk I don't need and making what i still have more compact. I gotta work on my resume and start applying.

Literally the only thing I think I'll miss from Ohio is Jungle Jims. Love that damn place. not living near my parents will suck for a bit, but frankly, I never wanted to live here anyway.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Not a huge fan of fish, but I do like crab, lobster, and shrimp and I think they all taste almost identical. You remove the texture and I wouldn't be able to say what it was, but I'd know it was shellfish. Only other seafood I like is tuna. But, like... From a can. Fresh caught and grilled? Ew. Idk what that says about my tastebuds.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

If you and your wife aren't opposed to camping, and can do so safely, you are allowed to set up a camp for one week at a time for free in any of the National Parks, that could give you a foothold to find a cheaper place in California. Cheaper is doing a lot of work in that previous sentence.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Our friend out west actually offered us a guest bedroom while we look. We’ve actually gotten multiple offers in different cities. We’re just either waiting out our lease or leaving when it gets suddenly too hostile then staying with our friends while we find a cheap place (looks like we can downsize to a similar rent)

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Good to hear! Just a heads up for you and your wife, anything next to the coast is priced outrageously, but if you look even half an hour drive inland, the prices drop quickly.

If you and your wife like nature, there are several reasonably priced places in Anza-Borrego. It's a tiny town out in the desert, in the middle of a state park. I saw a place out there a few months ago for only $58,000

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yeah, we’re looking at suburbs of Seattle and it’s not nearly as bad as we’d expected. Like without a job we’re going to be in a studio or something but it’s not nearly the financially devastating choice we’d worried. Otherwise we’d’ve probably looked at something like Annapolis or Minneapolis where it’s fine, but probably not much worse than Ohio cities.

The biggest things for us were being in a blue part of a blue state on the border with good job prospects for our careers

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 day ago

I like your thought process and just want to wish you the best of luck!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

#2 here. It would be nice to leave but I feel like I need to stay and fight.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

That’s ok. I’m proud of those of you who are doing that. I’m leaving, I’ve spent a long time working out of my martyr complex and my wife and I have decided to flee.

I think the biggest thing we can do here as a community is respect each other’s choices and try to figure out what we can do to help most from the position we take.

I want to make sure our history isn’t lost. I want to make sure that if we need voices advocating for us somewhere people will listen that I can be one. And I want to make clear that until I feel safe returning home that I am an Ohioan in exile, and that that means things aren’t ok over there.

Fight well and know that some of those of us who are fleeing are setting up networks to get y’all out if you need it.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

There's time to get a passport.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 days ago

Not much. If you don’t have one get it now

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That's... so few places to go to. Unless you have a spare 10k you don't need... or a remote high pay job.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

Yeah, that’s a contributor. I’m going to a blue state in the hopes it’s safer until things get bad enough for refugee status.