this post was submitted on 31 Aug 2024
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Autism
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A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.
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Sorry to hear about that it sounds very hard.
It definitely wasn't as easy as it might have sounded and I was very lucky to have been given a second chance where I was able to focus on these things.
But one of the biggest lessons I have learned along the way is that those people who say give it 100% are not for me. The only way I can get anywhere is to give it 5-10% today and then just keep trying to do 5-10% everyday. Eventually that 5-10% becomes 20, 30, etc. until I get in a nice rhythm whereas if I started by pushing myself to 100% on day one I would never do anything on day two. Not trying to say it's what's right for everyone or that it would work for you, but I wish you the best, it's a hard path.
A thousand times this. I've been in group therapy most of this year. A lot of faces have come and gone. I've gotten so tired of hearing variations on the above (along with the usual suggestions of task chunking, do X for Y minutes then break/reward, etc). But I've also learned how to handle it better. I assume good faith on their part and do what I can to explain my experience. Not everyone is going to get it, and to them I usually say "I hope you never understand." But there's almost always someone else nodding along... it's nice to not feel alone, but at the same time I feel awful that they know the nightmare.
I'm happy you got that second chance. We all need a mulligan sometimes. But so often it's not an option. Society is all round holes, and has little patience for the square pegs. I somehow made it work for 40 some odd years, but it took its toll.
And thank you for the kind words. Best to you as well. ๐ป