this post was submitted on 06 Aug 2024
1063 points (98.5% liked)

Not The Onion

12392 readers
1843 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Comments must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 142 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Turns out violent threats are not protected speech under the first amendment. Who knew?!

Fuck around and find out.

[–] [email protected] 64 points 3 months ago (1 children)

"Good people of the jury, my client is guilty of nothing more than merely forgetting to append 'in Minecraft,' to his statement."

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

He specified using pliers. Are there pliers in Minecraft?

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago

I've been told there are mods for everything.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They are if you're in Congress

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago

Oof. Sadly, events of the last few years support your statement. 🙄

[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 months ago

Up to 5 years to think about it.