this post was submitted on 09 May 2024
961 points (97.5% liked)

Funny

6793 readers
913 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (1 children)

Wow, this is such a biased take ughhh, let me rewrite this in proper newspeak.

"Last saturday an officers gun ejected from their holster after making contact with a dino toy grabber, the man holding the dino toy grabber retracted their arm from the situation and the firearm was taken along with the toy grabber. The man holding the dino toy testified in court the other day that he felt he had no other choice but to retract the dino grabber once the situation escalated from a playful dino bite to a potential non-armed dino bite attack and the firearm was unfortunately stuck in the jaws of the toy dino grabber which caused it to also be retracted. The police officer was not questioned for comment and had $500 dollars in their wallet at the time which was confiscated by local anarchists who believed the money was most certainly involved in some kind of illegal crimes at some point (a practice that surely would not be legal in a civilized society)."

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago (2 children)

$500 dollars

"Five-hundred-dollar dollars"

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

You got me, I have a mediocre command of the english language and I feel well about it.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Dimmadollars invented by Doug Dimmadome