this post was submitted on 06 Apr 2024
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Dad Jokes

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He has a seeing eye dog with him.

Once he gets to the bar, he grabs his dog by the tail and starts swinging it around over his head.

Everyone's horrified and the bartender finally yells out and asks, "What the hell are you doing?!"

The blind man says, "Just taking a look around."

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 7 months ago (1 children)

The main thing I like about this is that it rambles on instead of being about a collision with a bar.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 7 months ago (1 children)

We can't bust heads like we used to. But we have our ways. One trick is to tell stories that don't go anywhere. Like the time I caught the ferry to Shelbyville? I needed a new heel for m'shoe. So I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel, and in those days, nickels had pictures of bumblebees on 'em. "Gimme five bees for a quarter," you'd say. Now where were we? Oh, yeah. The important thing was that I had an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have any white onions, because of the war. The only thing you could get was those big yellow ones...

[–] [email protected] 9 points 7 months ago

Hehe I see what you did there. Reminds me of my uncle fergus. He was a rather interesting fella some might even say strange. Back in the year, oh I don't know, 1987. I know it was 1987 since I remember it being a rather cold summer that year and my glasses broke as well. Had to take it to get repaired in a small shop, this was wayyy before you could do it in malls and whatnot. Anywho, old uncle Fergus sure would ramble on and on till the cows came home, that was one of his favorite sayings. What does that even mean "when the cows come home?" Maybe it has to do something with ranch life but not sure.