I'm 35, I do okay. I mumble when I'm shy, and when I'm not into it, i.e. the pleasantries over the counter in a shop. I had the 'you talk like a robot' comments all through school. I know I speak a certain way and I'm mostly okay with it.
I bought a coffee this morning before getting the train into work. I did my usual awkward mumbling, I ordered the flat white with all the elocution I could muster so as to avoid repeating myself - I hate repeating myself - but the rest was mumbled and just audible enough for them to know that I asked to pay by card and that I was thanking them as I left.
There were two clerks, a small independent shop. The male clerk, upon me saying thanks and turning to walk to the door, gave an exaggerated mumble, which made the girl working with him laugh. I ignored it and left, but afterwards it really griped on me.
The only way to communicate with the establishment is by instagram, so I set up an account and messaged the business account (they own 3 shops in my local area). The person followed it up; naturally the pair working there said that it never happened. The owner has invited me back tomorrow, when he will be working with the male clerk, to receive an apology. I don't think I want to go. Should I go? I'm not sure what outcome I wanted, I think I just wanted to speak out about it.
I appreciate that the quiet hours in the shop are boring, and they need to make their own entertainment, but he could have just waited for me to leave the shop before he made his joke - although I do understand that to impress the girl it must done to me brazenly, for the shock factor required to make such a witless joke funny.
I'm not quite sure why this has aggravated me so much today, but it has. I can normally roll my eyes at this kind of stuff or laugh it off, but it really wound me up. Maybe because I am a paying customer and expect that in engaging in this process I am not going to encounter this kind of playground mentality.
Another possibility that I don't think I have read here so far: maybe the two clerks actually understand they did something wrong, and feel very sorry. It could be a touching experience if you see and feel actual regret and compassion, and the sincerity of their feelings might make you forgive them spontaneously. That could be cathartic and connecting.
I don't think you have an obligation for anything, neither for going there nor for forgiving them.
But giving people a chance to see the error of their ways and becoming better people can be very rewarding, if they take it.
This will work best if you can make them see a little bit what these Interactions mean for you. They probably have nooo idea what it's like to see the world from many other peoples' eyes.
Maybe the chances for this happening are slim, but I think it's a possibility.
It would be nice I agree, but there is as good a chance the guy is just a dick, and im not sure its worth me putting myself in the situation to find out now that ive raised it with the owner. I hope youre right, and I hope enough has been done for the person to have a realisation, but I dont want to confront him if its not the case, I think I will just stop going to the shop now