this post was submitted on 03 Jan 2024
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I want to thank everyone who gave me a bunch of great advice

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[–] [email protected] 40 points 8 months ago

I like when stories have a happy ending

[–] [email protected] 31 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 26 points 8 months ago (1 children)

That full stop is giving me anxiety

[–] [email protected] 16 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 8 months ago

I'm proud of you‽

[–] [email protected] 26 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I was wondering why you were still holding on to last year's shit. Glad to know everything came out alright!

[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago

Apparently my ass holds grudges

[–] [email protected] 18 points 8 months ago

Just so you know, I was concerned myself about having not pooped this year so I shared your last post with my girlfriend to show that I wasn't alone in my poopy predicament!

Needless to say, we've been awaiting this update 🫡

[–] [email protected] 17 points 8 months ago

Babe wake up new lemmy lore just dropped

[–] [email protected] 13 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 12 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Just remember the rule of 3. More than 3 times a day or less than once every 3 days is considered unhealthy. Anything between that should be fine

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

This is lemmy. We go at least three days without pooping.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Today is gonna be the day that you're gonna throw it back to poop

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

By now, you should have dropped trou' and done what you had to do

[–] [email protected] 11 points 8 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

The update we needed

[–] [email protected] 8 points 8 months ago

first poop in 2024

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago

Bah, three days, that's nothing! There was this guy on Reddit who didn't go for a month and a half and had to get unplugged at the hospital!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 8 months ago (1 children)

I poop now, as I read this, in solidarity ✊

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

me too, stand strong my brothers and sisters ✊

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

Please don't stand until the show is complete.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

i want you to know, i specifically looked for your update post. so glad you have found resolution.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago
[–] [email protected] 5 points 8 months ago

Literally shitpost

[–] [email protected] 4 points 8 months ago

The body is evolving to be more efficient…

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago

So is that beating the record or what?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 8 months ago (1 children)

You really should not have done that. Everyone who ever died has pooped.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 8 months ago

I suspect that is not accurate because of babies that only live for a few minutes or birth defects that require a colostomy.

But everyone who poops, eventually dies.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

I'm pooping right now

Lord have mercy

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

And? How was it?? I want consistency, color, smell, difficulty etc.

Details are what make for a good story

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago (1 children)

Glad it all worked out in the end

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

*Glad it all worked out of your end.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

i am glad to ear that

[–] [email protected] 1 points 8 months ago

i always read these in the voice of lemiwinks from South park.