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The Onion

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Health Experts Recommend Doing Exact Opposite Of Whatever Simon Cowell Doing To His Body (theonion.com)

submitted 3 months ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

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[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago (1 children)

So many upvotes and no comments because none of us know what to add to a perfect Onion article. It's short and sweet, too.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Can someone get me a pic of this Simon guy so I can understand the joke. I am prohibited from using search engines by the demon that has taken over my soul.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The article has a photo

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 months ago

Thank you :-)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 months ago

The old king of the beavers.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 months ago

https://www.usmagazine.com/celebrities/simon-cowell/

After looking at more photos to see if I could find something worse than what was in the article, I noticed that he has the same weird smile in alot of his photos. It’s like he’s purposely just exposing his top teeth when he smiles. I’m assuming it’s a sort of “rehearsed” smile he can pull out whenever he needs to, because celebrities are just expected to be “on” all the time, but it looks weirder the more I look at it. I’m not entirely certain what a “normal” smile is supposed to look like, but that’s not it.