The iPhone
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Anything that relies on mini/micro USB for charging. With enough repeated use, they eventually cause an early failure of the device.
Maytag dishwasher and gas dryer. Maytag had always purported themselves to be a top brand. However, both of these products would not last more than 4 years. I should have bought the Bosch dishwasher like consumer reports told me.
Košs KPH30i headphones. Those fuckers are an actual health hazard. They will make your ears suffer for the crime of putting them on.
Really sad cause Porta Pros are incredible. And I usually see people suggest getting the KPH30i instead. Don't do that.
I purchased a razor branded Smartwatch, way back when. Thing could barely connect to my phone, it's battery life was atrocious when it did, and all it did was show the time and track steps. It didn't have any built-in notifications so you had to use a separate app. This was fairly early in smart watches though, it was pretty fad-esque.
Samsung M540 "Slyde" phone - The software was incredibly buggy including things like just randomly typing the wrong letter. Randomly bad tech is so much more irritating than tech you know is bad.
Google Nexus 7 (2012) - The tablet had defective chips that slowed down over time. Turned into a horrible slow piece of shit over time.
When I was a child in the 90s I somehow scored a voice role in a hotdog commercial for the radio. I was paid a king's ransom for this, half of which my parents made me put in savings (wise), and half of which I spent on a brand new Sega CD (not wise).
The magic of postage stamp-sized full motion video took about three days to wear off, at which point all that was left was basically pure shit. They jacked me. At least I learned that lesson early.
My current Amazfit smartwatch. The only good thing about it is the long battery life.
It's a piece of crap otherwise. Requires the data harvesting app to always be running in the background or it loses connection to my phone. It's slow, has ugly watch faces and the custom ones are awkward to install. I can't get it to work with Gadgetbridge. The always on display is so dim that it's useless. Pinging my phone doesn't work.
I don't know why I let the Internet convince me that spending £120 on this thing was a good idea. I'm going Casio or something next time around.
Reeder tablet that came as a promotion with something. Could barely keep a single app open, sometimes. At some point low spec just means e waste
Metal detectors, just in general. My BF has one and the metal detectors just don't like me for some reason, I could never achieve success with it, like everything was a needle in a haystack. He was always "the detector" and me "the photographer" and I guess stuff just doesn't transfer over well.
Fuck the surface pro 3, you'll never get another cent from me Microsoft you fucking cunts! ( Except for halo mcc and infinite BUT NO MORE (unless the next halo is actually good but even the ONLY ON SALE))
Nintendo Wii: as a loyal Nintendo purchaser here from the Game & Watch, to the Super Nintendo, N64 and GameCube, but the Nintendo Wii never let me back up my purchased downloaded games in a way I could transfer to another Wii without online access. I get that that's now standard but it was the first time I was burnt by it.
I bought something on eBay for 10 dollars that was supposed to be able to copy key fobs. Didn't work.
A Xiaomi smartwatch. I never found any good use for its "smart" features and I had to charge the fucking thing all the time. So I ended up dropping it after a year in favor of a regular digital watch.
I was willing to put up with a lot of sacrifices for a $100 smartwatch but I was not expecting the level of trash I received. Unappealing and cheap looking silver colored case, typos in menus, and navigating the painfully underperformant UI made me immediately regret my purchase. There were many other issues I’ve since pushed out of my memory. I packed it up for a return within 24 hours.
The ONLY positive was supposedly the battery lasted weeks but I didn’t want to use the damn thing for more than 5 minutes.
An early Samsung phone my spouse bullied me into taking over from him. I don't know how anyone likes those. I went to Google phones and they're the only good thing about Google.
Any and all dishwashers and refrigerators I've ever owned. Fuck planned obscelence.