Ahhh, it's chips and fries I see.
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To avoid confusion, just say driver and passenger side.
I meant this to be a joke, but if you assume your bed drives forward toward the side with your pillows then it actually works. But if you read in bed with a reading pillow then I guess you probably want to drive your bed toward your feet side of the bed...
Driver and passenger side confuses me more because of your last point. It's backwards. But it still needs to be named foot of the bed and not head because it's where it feet go. So your first point also makes sense. Both are right and wrong at the same time
Obviously the perspective of lying on the bed face-up. Though I may be biased because our bed is next to the window (feet side) so you can't look at it form the foot of the bed -- either from the side or behind our heads
Imagine you are driving the bed. If you lean up you're looking forward. You could call them driver and passenger side based on this. Sort of like port and starboard lol.
Imagine you are driving the bed
actually quite enjoyable, ty!
but that would make beds the other way around in some countries
It is left as an exercise for the bed users who are from countries which drive on different side of the roads to determine their own phrasing.
My girlfriend lies on my right arm, so she's on the right side of the bed and I'm on the left.
If I'm talking about sides of the bed, I'm almost never in the bed at the same time, so I would be talking from a position at the foot of the bed. Beds are practically never in the middle of the room, so I wouldn't be standing over the head of the bed while orienting. So the foot of the bed is the default position to reference.
If I'm in bed and talking about sides, I usually just guesture and say, "this side" (or "your/my side" if I'm talking to my wife) instead of designating left or right.
I have no idea. Like others I usually request the side closest to the bathroom since I go during the night more often than her. I could see it either way.
Lie in bed on your back. Stick out your left hand. That is the left side of the bed. Stick out your right hand. That is the right side of the bed.
Completely arbitrary.
port-side?
"Complicated descriptions"? Is there a lamp on one side, or a closet door? Just use that as a frame of reference, I wouldn't call that a complicated description. Or, if you usually have the same bigs-poon, little-spoon orientation, you can describe which shoulder you're laying on. But I still think using features of the room is the simplest way. "I'm laying on the closet side."
Fair point. Complicated descriptions may have an exaggeration, but relative to simply left/right it's still mildly accurate. I'm not a sensory thinker so pulling from objects other than what I'm referencing seems like adding a few extra cognitive steps. Silly, I'm aware, but that's my brain.
Where is the head and foot of the bed? Where are the top and the bottom? If the bed were stood up on the foot, is the top the front or the back? These questions may have something to do with the answer or are completely meaningless.