this post was submitted on 02 May 2024
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politics

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[–] [email protected] 105 points 6 months ago (3 children)

“When there are sidebars, an attorney doesn’t leave his side anymore because leaving him alone means leaving him to potentially sleep,” Rubin said. “He has a stack of papers with him at all times now to go through.”

"We tried everything! Jangling keys above his head, coloring books and crayons featuring his favorite MAGA hero (himself), its just too difficult to try to keep him focused." -Rubin probably

[–] [email protected] 37 points 6 months ago (3 children)

I'd like to know what is in those papers. I wonder if they are just complementary news stories about him. I bet the only subject that can hold his attention is himself.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 6 months ago

Probably just blank papers. It's still debatable whether he can actually read.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 6 months ago (1 children)

My guess? Stolen classified files missed during the Mar-a-lago file seizure. Would it surprise anyone if he brought incriminating evidence into court?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Like a guy with a suspended license who drives to his DUI trial.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Someone prints out a twitter feed

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Not much of a twist.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago

its just too difficult to try to keep him focused

Put a McDonald's meal in front of him. That'll get his attention.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I saw this episode of It's Always Sunny where they used a Bluetooth vibrator to help Frank cheat at chess.

[–] [email protected] 62 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You would think that this trial would hold his interest

  • it's about himself
  • his name is mentioned repeatedly
  • gives him an excuse to play victim
[–] [email protected] 41 points 6 months ago

I actually don't blame him on the falling asleep stuff. Look at the facts: he's old as shit, he's overweight, he's going senile, and he probably has a myriad of health problems which are undisclosed and is probably on a complex cocktail of drugs to ease them. He's a fucking walking corpse and should have never held the office that he did

[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago) (2 children)

This article won't be read by any of his supporters and if they do happen to see it, it will be dismissed as fake news

[–] [email protected] 26 points 6 months ago (1 children)

No. They'll see it as a power move.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Fox News is already framing it that way.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

Right. These damn Trumpsters are too far gone.

[–] [email protected] 35 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Maybe they could fit him with a shock collar.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

You beat me to the punch 😂

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

punch

That'd probably do the trick, too.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Use one of those butt plugs that the chess guy used to cheat. It has an app. BUZZ BUZZ wake up you traitor!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 6 months ago

Holy shit you read my mind.

Literally the first thing I thought. 🤣

[–] [email protected] 17 points 6 months ago

Awh, is Dozin' Don finding that age effects everyone? Even diaper-wearing dictators?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 6 months ago (1 children)

have they considered installing electrodes up his ass? I bet that'd wake him up.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 6 months ago

Put a UV light up there too. Would cure his Covid.

/s

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Maybe he needs to revive with vivarin. Would be nice if he didn't wake up one of these times

[–] [email protected] 10 points 6 months ago

Just wish he'd fall asleep...forever.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 6 months ago (2 children)

There is an Adderall shortage, so it makes sense.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Yeah that combined with him checking every single risk factor for obstructive sleep apnea.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Why isn't this being recorded? The world needs to see the magoos' golden emperor-god farting as he falls asleep in court.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 6 months ago (1 children)

No cameras in federal courts

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Isn't this state Court? So many trials, so many crimes, hard to keep track.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 6 months ago

Are we 100% sure he isn't staying awake past bedtime on purpose? I don't know if there is an argument to be made that because he didn't hear the trial, they clearly need to hold another one ... ?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 6 months ago

Who cares if he falls asleep anyway? Unless ... that's when the smells arise.