this post was submitted on 18 May 2025
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That’s interesting. I wonder how much religion plays into it. My marriage is monogamous but we are both open to each other about attractions outside the marriage. It is OK to be turned on by someone else or some other situation, and we can use that together. It also helps that we both don’t generally like other people; we have a close knit group of friends but most folks we meet outside that are obnoxious and gross.
Like everything there's some puritan morals involved. Most of which are around how sex and sexual desire are gross and not important. Couple that with the idea that suffering makes you a good person they all connect.
Also I think media plays a big role as well. Some toxic relationships are glorified in rom-coms and other media. Add in the normalization of weaponized jealousy in reality TV. Throw in the new micro cheating that the Internet and relationships experts who make mountains out of molehills. It's a complex mix