Asklemmy

43846 readers

762 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

Open-ended question
Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

Lemmyverse: community search
sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
[email protected]: a community for finding communities

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago

MODERATORS

[email protected]

142

Is it too late to date for me? (lemmy.ml)

submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/[email protected]

109 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Hi my fellow Lemmy users! It’s been a while since I used this platform and boy did I actually miss you all ❤️

It’s just that I’ve been more so focusing on myself in my career and in my own education. So I graduated back in June and man it sure does feel like a lifetime ago already. Settled in a good paying job and still trying to improve myself wherever I can.

This brings us to the question that I wanted to ask everyone here. As I’ve been very focused on academics and career stuff I never had the opportunity to date and I’ve been rejected very frequently (which is to be expected as a man tbh). I haven’t been able to lose weight and that I’m 25 years old.

I know that’s still pretty young but I still feel so behind on dating tbh. Is it still too late for me to find someone I want to be with after I’ve lost weight? Does losing weight help for men as it does for women? I’ve been trying to join meetups, volunteering (just to meet new people tbh) and really put myself out there. It’s just idk like all my friends are committed and I’m just floating around life whilst focusing on my career.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 year ago

I've started dating a bit late and let me tell you: you can't really be behind. Yeah, there's some generic interpersonal experience you get from dating, but that maxes out at like, 3 months of dating. So I'd put someone who's dated for 3 months and someone who's dated for like 6 years at basically the same point experience wise, if they're both put into a situation where they're back on the dating market after it.

You do build personal rapport with a person during a relationship, but people start and stop those all the time - everyone's on a different schedule, you can't really compare yourself to that.

Oh, and on the weight loss point - don't sweat it!! Being chubby is way less of a dealbreaker when you're a guy. And the people who do mind aren't people you should be giving a chance to anyways 🤷