this post was submitted on 02 Dec 2024
1807 points (98.2% liked)

Microblog Memes

6027 readers
1222 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] [email protected] 9 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

If I were an evil engineer I’d make retractable benches built into the walls that cost money to pull out. If I were a public official I’d have a subscription package for $60/yr that lets you use all the benches in the city. Must have a valid drivers license to purchase.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

I would let anyone extend the bench but if the systems detects the user doesn't have a valid subscription it folds back into the wall compressing the person into a chunky soup.

I would name these benches after our favorite economic model - the meat grinder.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Until they finally just make the suicide booths, people would just use your benches.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

(I absolutely think we can/are able to normalise this)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The detection algorithm is also trash and may decide to eat you anyway, as well.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 2 weeks ago

It's not a bug, it's a feature.

I would go sleep on one the night my subscription is about to expire.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago

I hope you're not either of those things...

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

I would hack that system and provide cards to homeless people that give them free access to all benches in the city.

Boom, problem solved. With capitalism!