this post was submitted on 06 Oct 2024
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They line up in front of a courthouse in southeastern France, from morning to evening, and have gathered in the thousands in cities across the country. They hold signs reading, "one rape every six minutes," "not all men but always a man," and "giving in is not consenting."

They chant: "Rapist we see you, victim we believe you."

Women across France are rallying in support of Gisèle Pelicot, a 72-year-old reluctant icon whose husband is on trial in the city of Avignon for systematically drugging her and inviting dozens of men, 50 of whom are now his co-defendants, into their home to rape her over nearly a decade.

The shocking case has sparked what many women in France call a long-overdue reckoning over "rape culture" and systemic sexism in the way the judicial system handles sexual violence.

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[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 months ago (3 children)

I find it incredibly interesting that male victims are exclusively brought up in conversations about female victims, just as hate crimes against white people are exclusively brought up in conversations about hate crimes against African Americans, or how hate crimes against Christians are exclusively brought up in conversations about hate crimes against Jews and Muslims. If you use the pain of a group as a form of whataboutism then fundementally you do not care about their suffering, what you are doing is creating a competition that nobody will win. After you're finished using your group against another group do you truly care about them? I see many people here talking about male victims but how many people here support movements like mens liberation?

[–] [email protected] 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Yeah it's our fault we're upset about being lumped in with the "always men" abusers crowd while our rapists are lauded as "never abusers" on signage like this. How dare we be so uppity to engage our anger with that sign directly.

I'm literally in here saying "that sign is a lie and it makes me angry, as a male victim of woman rapists," we can talk about "stop raping men too" and "charge women for rape not just 'sexual assault' when they compel sex" later, right now we're talking about "don't erase us with signs like these, please fucking include us in the movement" and we probably won't stop doing that until it happens. Why must there be "I don't care about male victims" and "I don't care about woman victims" groups? Can't we just join forces as victims vs abuse?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 2 months ago (1 children)

For an exercise, check out other articles posted about Gisele's case, and look for comments about male victims. Most people just post in support of her, or in hatred of her abusers.

The reason why this conversation exploded on the topic was the picture chosen for it. It is meant to be divisive, drive engagement and thus, ad revenue.

We're all being farmed for engagement, which takes away from what is important, seeking justice without looking at genders.

That picture is very triggering to the many, many victims of rape with female perpetrators, especially if the victims are male, hence the outrage.

[–] [email protected] -3 points 2 months ago (2 children)

Yeah but I find it funny that those same people who say "well its not always a man" very often also say "well x is a minority therefore they shouldn't receive any representation whatsoever". In addition I would personally argue that most people here claiming to be victims are most likely lying (who knew people on the Internet could lie).

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

You're either trolling, or too far gone. I am saying "It is not always a man", and I would never keep representation away from someone just for being a minority, or associate with people who behave like that.

And honestly, I find it appalling, that you jump to assume people claiming to have been raped here are most likely lying, and wonder if you would say that to a woman who claims to have been raped.

And if for you, that hinges on gender alone, you would have to be either extremely thick, or simply arguing in bad faith to ignore how sexist that is.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 months ago

Im saying that theres a difference between someone coming out in public and a bunch of random people on a forum who are attempting to make a point. Also my point about those people actively silencing minorities wasn't directed at you.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

That's one hell of a strawman to invent and ascribe to folks who have no whiff of implying minorities shouldn't receive representation.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Instead of thinking of it as competition, think of it as people simply reminding others that "all rape is bad" or "all hate crimes are bad".

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 months ago

Thats like saying all lives matter specifically after an African American gets brutally killed by a cop. Obviously all lives matter but its simply not the time nor place when the conversation was about hate crime against African Americans. In this case its absolutely distasteful to say "all rape is bad" when the topic is specifically about a female victim and a male perpetrator.